


So That's Why They Call It Undercover Work

by Athingor3



Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: Angie moves to Hollywood without Peggy, Angie speaks Italian when she's excited, F/F, Mentions of Murder, Peggy Carter in a men's undershirt does things to Angie, Peggy Carter in a newsboy hat does things to Angie, Post Season 1, old hollywood mystery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2015-08-28
Packaged: 2018-04-10 05:25:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4378943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Athingor3/pseuds/Athingor3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angie walks in and sees Peggy trying to carry off a disguise as a laborer and things get out of hand.  Then she overhears a conversation she shouldn't have heard and runs off to Hollywood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Margaret “Peggy” Carter was many, many things, beautiful, stylish, proper things, and above all, English things but I never thought of her as stupid. If asked, I’d have said she was intelligent. Until now, that is. Peggy Carter was standing next to Dum Dum Dugan in the living room of Howard Stark’s apartment that we now shared in the most ridiculous getup I’ve ever seen. She was wearing a newsboy cap, her hair spilling almost to her shoulders, an a-shape men’s undershirt, men’s trousers and boots.

“Whaddya think, Angie?” Dugan asked me. “We have to sneak into the Italian countryside for a mission. We thought we’d go as…what was it again Peggy?”

“Laborers, Dugan,” Peggy sighed.

“Yeah, laborers. Whaddya think, Angie?”

Laborers? Yeah, right. The day a red-blooded Italian mistook those curves for a man would be the day pigs fly. This Italian certainly wasn’t. The woman was trying to kill me. I mean, I’m not doll-dizzy or nothin’ but that outfit only highlighted her attributes that I was tryin’ like the dickens to ignore. I could have eaten her with a spoon. 

I saw a revival of Morocco when I was in high school. It was playing at a movie theater at the edge of the neighborhood. I must have snuck in there a dozen times, hopin’ nobody would see me. But I had to see Marlene Dietrich in that tux just one more time. And when she kissed that girl? I felt a fluttery sensation that I didn’t know how to explain. So, I’m a sucker for beautiful women in men’s clothing, evidently. Maybe ridiculous wasn’t the right word. Delicious, that was a better word. I could just eat her up. And I meant that the way it sounded.

I had been trying to ignore my growning attraction to Peggy for months now with varying degrees of success. Who was I kidding? It was like gettin’ hit by a train. Being near Peggy was like standing on the edge of the subway platform when the Express came through. Take a girl’s feet right out from under her if she’s not careful. I needed to get out of here if she was going to wear that outfit. It was doing things to me. Indecent things. Oh, how I wanted to do indecent things with Peggy. That outfit was one thing, but then she looked at me, smiled and slipped her tongue into her cheek between her teeth. Like she knew a secret. My secret. So my reaction was more obvious than I was hoping for. No wonder I can’t get a callback at an audition. I can’t pretend not to carry a torch for my roommate. I either needed to take a powder or face it head on.

To focus the attention back on her, and to get around to the issue or issues at hand, I said, “The way I see it, you have two major obstacles that will keep people from believing that you’re working men,” I glanced down at her chest and smirked.

“We were gonna put her hair up in tha cap,” Dugan replied.

“Good Lord, Dugan, you ape. She’s talking about my bosom!”

I broke out into a fit of giggles so severe that I snorted. Dugan looked back and forth between us his mouth opening and closing like a goldfish I had once. “Gah, Pegs, I never really noticed,” he said. 

That was it. I had to sit down on the sofa because I was laughing so hard. Peggy looked as if Dugan had slapped her across the face. “I’ll have you know, I have an excellent bosom!” She exclaimed and they both turned beet red in two heartbeats.

I took pity on them, “Ya sure do, English. The argument could be made that they’re even better than your legs, and that’s saying something. But with ‘em, I sure as hell don’t think any Italian with eyes is going to mistake you for a man. So what’s your plan?”

“I was going to wrap them in bandages,” she said and I tilted my head to say that wasn’t going to do it. “Obviously, I was going to wear some type of over-shirt and or jacket as well.”

“I’m gonna…I gotta go and check with…I’ll just…go,” Dugan stammered out the front door. It locked behind him, one of the perks of living at Howard’s, excellent security.

I watched him walk out the door and hoped that when I spoke to her next I wouldn’t stammer like he just did. “You can’t tell me where you’re going or why can you?” 

“I’m afraid not.”

“You know, I speak Italian,” I tried to reason with her.

“And you know I speak fluent Italian as well.”

“Yes, English, you speak perfect Italian. Perfect book learned Italian. I speak Italian like my mother and my grandmother who learned in a little village outside of Palermo. I speak Italian like a local, like a working-class local. You speak it like a school teacher.”

“Be that as it may…”

I stood so maybe she’d listen to my plea. “Peggy, you’re my best friend. I know that the life you live means there are things you can’t tell me, things I can’t know. I know you think you’re protecting me, or keeping an oath you made. You are so damn honorable sometimes it scares me. But this, this I could do. I’d do it for you in a heartbeat because you mean that much to me.”

“Angie…” she stops, closes her eyes and swallows. When she opens them, I know I have a snowball’s chance in hell of going. “For myriad reasons, you going is not what’s best. Though I have no doubt there would be times where you’d be a most capable asset.”

“English…” I turned away in frustration.

“I can’t do what I need to do if I’m worried about you, darling.”

My head whipped around so fast I hurt my neck. “What did you call me?”

“I called you ‘darling’. I…I…didn’t mean…”

“You didn’t mean it that way. I get it, English. It’s just how you talk. No problem.” I waved my hand in dismissal. I didn’t really know why I reacted like that. She’d called me ‘darling’ before but this time it was something about her tone. Damn, I hated getting my hopes up. 

“That’s not what I said.”

My eyes snapped to hers and I just stared at her. I waited. And waited. “Well, what did you mean?” I prodded gently.

“I…I…”

“Spill it, English.”

“I didn’t mean to say it at all.” She started rubbing her hands together and staring at her shoes. “That is to say, I didn’t mean to blurt it out like that.” 

I reached out and gently stilled her hands. “It’s like pullin’ teeth with you.” I rubbed my thumbs across the knuckles of the back of her hand.

She smiled a shy smile at me. “You know I used to be better at this.”

“You expect me to take your word for that?”

“I suppose not.”

“So start from the beginning then.”

She took a deep breath, “Angie, I think…I mean I believe…that I…You see…I can’t…”

“You’re awful at this, English. Just plain awful.” I smiled to take the sting out of my words. If she got any more adorable, I was going to kiss her senseless and I got the feeling that she didn’t want it to go that way. 

She let go of my hands abruptly and turned away from me moving her hand through her hair peeking out of the cap and tucking it behind her ear. “Oh, Bollocks! I’m making a right mess of this.”

Now I took the deep breath. “Just go slow. Maybe that will help.”

She turned back to me. “I doubt it.” She gestured to the sofa. We both walked over and sat down, turned slightly to one another. “I’ve come to think very highly of you, Angie. You are quite possibly the best friend I’ve ever had. I think I’m closer to you than I’ve ever been to anyone in my life. That being said, I know that it’s not enough for you.”

“But it is, English. It is.”

“It’s not. It shouldn’t be.” She looked at me, and the look on her face was pleading even if her tone wasn’t. “You should never settle, my darling. Never. You deserve so much more.”

It was all I could do not to kiss her. “Margaret Carter, do not tell me what I deserve. If you don’t want more than what we have, that’s fine. I accept it, but don’t lecture me about what I deserve. You are so much more than you think you are.”

“I know my value,” she replied seriously.

“Sure ya do,” I snorted.

“Angie,” she warned. 

“Look, English, I know I’ve been pining for you like some sort of long lost puppy. I’m sorry. I’ve always been this way, but I can stop it where you’re concerned. I can. If you don’t feel that way, that’s fine. I’ll do whatever you want if you’ll just not leave me. I can be whoever you want,” I pleaded.

“That’s just it. I don’t want you to be anything else but who you are. I wish that you could accept who you are. You are beautiful, vivacious, intelligent, and the most caring person I’ve ever met. If it was anyone else, I’d make up some subterfuge about how I don’t feel the same way or that I have someone else.” She stopped and looked at me. I felt like I was drowning in those chocolate eyes. “But you, I can’t do that with you. My work is dangerous. People around me have a habit of dying. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if my work touched you in even the most peripheral way, much less caused you harm.”

“English, don’t you see? It already affects me because it affects you. I worry about you. I will always worry about you. No matter what happens with us. And in case you haven’t noticed, Agent Carter, your work is directly touching me right now! It’s keeping me from being happy.”

“But, Angie, be reasonable…”

I couldn’t stand it a minute longer. “Basta!” I grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her for all I was worth. She resisted me just for show, because let’s be honest, if Peggy Carter hadn’t wanted me to kiss her, I wouldn’t have. Her lips were softer than I had imagined them to be. I started a stream of what I’m sure was less than perfect Italian as I began to kiss down her neck. “tu sei il più testardo… ostinato… non si arriva a prendere tutte le decisioni ... capisci?”

“Sì caro. Qualunque cosa tu dica.”

“Di nuovo.”

“Si Mio caro. Qualunque cosa tu dica.”

I stopped kissing her and looked her in the eye. “Meglio. Now, are we going to have any more of this nonsense about how you’re bad for me?”

She looked down at me and smirked. “No. Not now that I know you can kiss like that,” She said as she rested her hands on my hips.

“English!” I said, scandalized.

“I’m teasing you, my beautiful, impulsive angel,” she said and smiled. Then a shadow crossed her face. “I’m serious about if my work hurts you, if I hurt you, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“Then don’t hurt me,” I said and she looked at me and sighed. “I know what I’m getting into, Peggy. I trust you though. But if something does happen to me,” she started shaking her head and I took it between my hands. “If something happens to me, remember this moment. I’d rather be with you than without you. I’ll take every precaution you tell me to, except for not having you in my life, just be honest with me. If you can’t tell me something, just say so.”

“Alright.”

“Alright?” I asked and moved my hands to rest on her collarbones. Oh, the skin there was so warm, and soft.

“I have to admit that this approach has some obvious benefits.” She arched her eyebrow at me and smiled that smile that I was realizing was just for me.

“Do you want to tell me about them?” 

“I’ll make you a deal. I’ll tell you, if you tell me what you were thinking when you walked in here.” She pursed her lips.

I laughed. ‘Not a chance, English. I don’t want to scare you away.”

“I’m not all that easily scared.”

“Huh, well around me, you spook real easy. It’s why I haven’t made a pass at you before now. I didn’t want to send you running for the hills.”

“I suppose I deserve that. You’re right. I’ve done my best to hold you at arm’s length. I promise you though, it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.”

“You made it look pretty easy, English,” My eyes found the floor. I couldn’t look into her eyes and be that vulnerable.

“My darling,” she reached over and pulled my chin up with one siren red tipped finger. “I’ll make you a promise now. You will never again have to wonder how I feel about you. I quite fancy you. As a matter of fact, I think I’m falling in love with you.”

I couldn’t have stopped the smile on my face if I’d wanted to. “Only think, English?”

“Well, I have been trying to talk myself out of it since I met you…I’m very persuasive.” She smirked at me and leaned in for a kiss.

“Oh, really, just how…” I started but she cut me off with a searing kiss and pinned me against the arm of the sofa. Jesus, Mary and Joseph. I should have known I wouldn’t have the upper hand with Peggy Carter for long. She began to kiss my neck and I began to babble in Italian. I think it’s because it was the first language I learned. The language that I always break into when my emotions run high. So if I’m…excited…Italian. It’s always happened, but I’m usually able to contain it to my thoughts mostly, keep myself from running off at the mouth. Not with Peggy though, with Peggy I sound like I really am from that little village outside of Palermo. I wrap my arms around her upper back and I’m vaguely aware of, “Oh Dio…non si…fermano!” coming out of my mouth before Peggy pulls her head back, her lipstick smudged and her eyes are even darker than normal.

“Darling, I can’t tell if you’re saying ‘Don’t’ and ‘Stop’ or if you’re saying ‘don’t stop’ but I need to know fairly quickly here because if I need to stop…”

“Shut up, English! Always with the talking.” I pulled her so close, I could feel her breath across my lips as I spoke. “If I need you to stop, you’ll get it in English, alright? And why the heck would I want you to stop while I’m pulling you closer to me? Are you sure you’re a secret agent? Cause, you sure don’t pick up on when a girl is throwing herself at you.”

Her eyebrow arched. “Throwing herself at me? I’m fairly certain I would have picked up on that. Do tell.”

I rolled my eyes. “Voglio assaggiarti,” I murmured against her lips. I kissed her and kissed her. I pushed forward so that now she was underneath me on the sofa. I pulled back and said softly in her ear, “Ti voglio. Ti voglio così male che mi sta facendo impazzire.”

“I’m all yours, my darling angel. All yours.”

There was a knock at the front door. Peggy tilted her head back and sighed. “Bloody hell. That’ll be Dugan. If I don’t answer it, he’ll just pick the lock.”

“I thought Howard said it was ‘impregnable’ or something.”

“My darling, no such thing.” She turned to the door, “Just a moment, Dugan!” She kissed my head and started to get up. I made a noise of protest and she looked at me. She took my face in her hands again. “I have to go.”

“I know.”

“Angie, this is something that I want you to think about when I’m not in such close proximity to you. My duty will always come first. It’s who I am.” I start to say something and she touched her forefinger to my lips briefly. “Don’t say anything now. I know what it is to wait for someone who’s dedicated to ‘the greater good’. In a word, it’s shite. I know what I’m asking of you. If something happens to me, I…I don’t want you to feel like that,” she finished, looking directly into my eyes.

“Okay, English. I’ll think about it.

“Promise me.”

I faltered. She looked at me again. I rubbed my hand down my neck. “Okay, I promise.”

“Good,” she smiled and stood up. 

“So. What are ya gonna do about your two obstacles?” I grinned.

“Bind them I suppose.”

“Need any help?” I wiggled my eyebrows.

She laughed. “You and I both know if I take my shirt off in front of you now, neither of us is leaving this room for a very, very long time.”

“English, you sure know how to get under a girl’s skin. In my book, when a dame talks to you that way, she doesn’t go traipsing halfway across the world right after.”

“It’s good to know that I’m shattering your expectations,” She grinned. Then seemed to think about it more. She narrowed her eyes and said, “Exactly how many ‘dames’ have talked to you that way?”

I laughed. Not as hard as I was laughing on the sofa earlier but I laughed. “You’re jealous!”

“I am no such thing.”

“Don’t feed me that line. I wasn’t born yesterday. Admit it, English or I go and tell Dugan you love his singing.”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

“Try me.”

“Fine. I…am…not fond…of the idea that…”

“Ease up, English. Don’t pull nothin’. You’re lucky you’re such a dreamboat. I’m gonna let you off the hook this time.”

She smiled at me, “I am grateful. Now, I’m going to go to my bedroom and take care of my ‘obstacles’ as you insist on calling them. Please let Dugan in and don’t tease him.” She turned and began walking toward her bedroom.

“Aww, can’t a girl have any fun?”

“Evidently not.”

“English?”

“Yes,” she said as she turned back to me.

“You be real careful now. Ya hear me?”

She smiled back at me, “I promise, darling, as careful as I can be.”

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Of course Peggy wasn’t careful. She came back with more holes in her than a block of swiss cheese. Dugan told me that they had to stop off at a hospital in France but that when she was conscious she asked to be brought home as soon as possible. Apparently, there were some questions about how a woman could get shot that many times without being involved in…what did Dugan say Peggy said? Something ‘nefarious’. I had to look it up.  
Howard paid for a doctor to fly with them back to watch her. Dugan said the turbulence musta shook something loose a couple of times because the medical team would start shouting and pressing on Peggy again every so often. By the time they got her to a super-secret spy agency approved hospital she’d been unconscious for almost 24 hours. She’d stay that way for the next week. I knew because I sat next to her bedside. Well, she was unconscious but still she’d make noises like she was trying to talk. Around day two I figured out what she was trying to say…Steve. I should have figured as much. I was going to have to get used to living in the big guy’s shadow. Know that I wasn’t who she really wanted if she’d have had the choice. I swallowed my pride and talked to her and wiped sweat off her brow.

“English, it’s me Angie. We’re all here and we miss you. Just…rest for now. Everything is okay. Everything is going to be okay.”

The first day she woke up I was so excited to see her eyes I could’ve done a jitterbug in the middle of that hospital ward. I tried not to see the disappointment in her eyes. Told myself that she was just tired, but it was there. I could live with it. I could. I would.

“English, so glad you could join us,” I said and smiled at her as I cupped her cheek gently.

“Angie, what are you doing here?”

“Keeping you company.”

“Where am I?”

“It’s a hospital on 64th.” I pulled my hand back from her face and rested both in my lap. Hopefully, she wouldn’t notice the shaking.

“I’m back home?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t remember.”

“Can you tell me the last thing you do remember?”

“Probably shouldn’t.”

I sighed. “Do you remember the hospital in France and asking Dugan to take you home?”

“Vaguely.”

“Well, that’s what happened.”

“What day is it?”

“Wednesday.”

“How is that…”

“The 14th. You’ve been out of it for a week now, English. Layin’ down on the job. They’re talking about dockin’ your pay.” I smiled.

She smiled back at me. “Can’t have that now. Can we? What about you? How long have you been here?”

“A while,” I dodged.

“What about your pay? I assume the good customers at the L&L haven’t begun to serve themselves coffee.” She tried to sit up.

“Not so fast. Lemme get one of those doctor types. Tell ya what you can and can’t do. There’s a list of can’ts a mile long.”

“I see.” She stopped moving but picked up where she left off. “Now about your job.”

“Nora offered to take a few of my shifts. Vivian took the rest. It’s fine, English.” I stood up and walked out of the room before she could say any more.

XXXXXXXX

Once Peggy was conscious it was harder to stay at her bedside. She kept after me until I started taking my regular shifts at the automat. I was there trying my hardest not to think about Peggy when some guy at the counter kept staring and staring at me.

“Take a picture fella. It’ll last longer.”

He laughed. “That’s great! That’s just what we need.”

“Who’s we?”

He took a card out of his pocket. “Raymond Morris. I’m a talent scout for Paramount. We’re casting a new picture with Alan Ladd and we need an ingénue to play a waitress.”

“Look fella, maybe this works where you come from.”

“Just take the card. Go over there to the pay phone. Reverse the charges and tell the operator to connect you to the Paramount switchboard. When they ask who from, give them my name. When they accept, and they will, ask to speak to the head of talent scouting and then ask him about me.”

I walked over the phone booth. This couldn’t be real. I did it. I did it all and the man on the phone said, “Tell that so-n-so to get on the phone.”

“He’s really a talent scout for Paramount?” I still couldn’t believe it.

“He sure is, honey, and if he’s got you on the phone he thinks you’re something special. So tell him to get on the phone.”

I held the phone out to the man and watched the exchange. “Yeah, yeah. She’s perfect. For the Alan Ladd picture. Yeah. Then maybe we can do something like a career girl thing. You know like Tierney in Laura. Yeah. I’m gonna send her out on the train tonight.”

Tonight? Whoa. Hold on a minute. I can’t leave. What about Peggy?

He hung up and looked at me. “Sweetheart, what’s your name”

“Angie…Angela Martinelli.”

“Okay Angie. We can keep Angie but Martinelli is too Italian. We’ll change it to Martin. Got it?”

“Uhh…”

He continued on completely ignoring me. “Here’s a ticket on the train at 8 tonight. I’ll go and get another for me. You’ll have your own compartment. Don’t worry about too many clothes or whatever because the studio will want to outfit you when you get there. We’ll do a screen test and if you pass, they’ll sign you to a contract and set you up an apartment, wardrobe, the works.”

I couldn’t say anything. I was speechless.

“Angie?”

I shook my head a little, “Yeah?”

“You gonna take the ticket?” He held out his hand with the ticket again.

“Yeah.”

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I couldn’t get out of the automat fast enough. I had to go and talk to Peggy. Tell her how crazy this was. I realized that I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t leave her. But I’d have other chances and if I didn’t, I’d live with it. Angie Martinelli doesn’t run and desert the people she loves, not when they need her the most.

I walked down the hospital corridor and was at her door when I heard her voice. “I just don’t know what to say to her, Howard.”

“C’mon, Pegs. It can’t be that hard. She loves you.”

“I know, but I have no idea how to be with her.”

“She’s not Steve, Pegs.”

“I know that. Don’t you think I know that?” She said sharply.

“Give her a chance.”

“I’m trying. I don’t know if I want to be with her.”

I walked as quickly and as silently as I could back the way I had come. I guess I had my answer. I flew into the penthouse and started throwing things in my suitcase. I cried as I wrote a hasty note to Peggy:

English,  
I just got discovered! I have to leave tonight or I’ll miss my chance. I’m taking this as a sign. I think we both know that it’s just not going to work out between us. I wish only good things for you.  
All my love,  
Angie

My clean getaway was interrupted by Mr. Fancy. “Miss Martinelli, pardon me. I thought you’d be at the hospital visiting Miss Carter.”

I wiped my eyes as nonchalantly as I could and put on my best smile. “Mr. Jarvis! I got discovered! Can you believe it?”

“Pardon?”

“I have to go to Hollywood. Tonight. Could you give this to, English? Other English I mean.”

“Of course. You’re not going to tell her yourself?”

“Can’t. Don’t have time. Thanks!” 

“Miss Martinelli, my sincerest congratulations.” He looked like he wanted to say something more but the good butler in him won out. 

“Thanks! Mr. Jarvis?” 

“Take good care of Peggy. Okay?”

“Of course, Miss Martinelli.”

“Thank you.” I fled.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The train ride out west was easily the most luxurious thing I’d ever experienced with the minor exception of Howard Stark’s penthouse. The studio brought me in, screen tested me and signed me to an exclusive contract. They put me up in a swanky house that had almost as much room as the penthouse I was trying so hard not to think about, but it was all mine so there was that. I did the picture they brought me out there for right away. It was a small part but it was something to sink my teeth into. It was a waitress who falls in love with a mysterious secret agent and helps him get away from some thugs. I got to make out with Alan Ladd in an alleyway then he gets shot and I got to mourn him as he calls out another woman’s name as he dies. The director said I was born to play the part. He had no idea.

I got elocution lessons so I could lose my New York accent. They dressed me, danced me, sprayed and spritzed me. By the time they were finished I didn’t even know who I was anymore. They changed my name to Gloria Martin. I didn’t even get to keep Angie. It’s what I always wanted right? I resolutely, that’s a new word I learned in my elocution class, refused to think about Peggy. Much. Okay I was lousy at it. I wondered how she was. If she was recovering okay. If she was letting Mr. Fancy take care of her. I subscribed to all the New York papers and looked for any mentions of odd and unusual things. Sometimes I thought I found something. Like there was a gas explosion off 124th. No one was hurt because a woman had run out of the building yelling, “Get back straightaway! Get back!” If that wasn’t Peggy Carter then I’m not Angie Martinelli…well you know what I mean.

Being queer in Hollywood wasn’t so bad. There were a lot of us here. You still had to be real careful but not as careful as when all the mothers in the neighborhood knew who you were. You looked for the signs. Everyone was fixed up with a beau by the studio. I lucked out that mine was queerer than me, Edward ‘Ned’ Jackson. He was a sweet fella though and luckily we looked cute together. He’s the one that invited me to my first party. I got to meet Dietrich. I couldn’t talk I was so nervous. I heard that Hedy Lamarr once said, “Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.” Truer words were never spoken. The less I talked, the more they wanted me. All of them. Men. Women. Some that weren’t sure. Dietrich was fantastic in bed. But all I did was think about Peggy. Shame that. I’m sure though that between Dietrich’s German and my Italian we sounded like a meeting of the Axis powers. It was best that we parted ways. She didn’t seem too broken up about it either.

Things were going great. They dyed my hair red for my next picture. They were loaning me out to MGM. I was supposed to be Lucille Ball’s kid sister in it, or maybe even to be a suspect in the new Thin Man sequel. Then they were talking about letting me be a new love interest for Tyrone Power if they could work something out with 20th Century. Like I said, great. That is, until a girl from one of the secret parties turned up dead. Strangled. A girl I had slept with about two months ago. I was terrified it was all going to unravel and then where would I be. Fortunately, I wasn’t at the party in question. Everyone there was going to be blackballed. Well, except Dietrich. I don’t know what she knew, or who she knew it on, but she was bulletproof.

When my doorbell rang almost a year after I’d left New York the last person I expected to see there was Peggy Carter. She was taking off her sunglasses and speaking simultaneously, “Miss Martin, my name is Janet…” I saw the moment she realized who I was. I saw her eyes fire briefly and then it was gone. “Harmon. We’d like to ask you some questions about Betty Baker.” Peggy Carter could give acting lessons like a champ. The fact that she didn’t know it was me told me all I needed to know. She never looked for me. If she’d wanted to, she could have found out. She had no idea that Gloria Martin was me. I took in the man with a crutch by her side. He looked familiar. He was one of the men that were trying to arrest Peggy at the Griffith long ago. 

“Who would like to ask me questions? You didn’t say who you were with. They always do that in the movies.” I smirked at her. Gosh, that was a good line. I was proud of myself.

“No we didn’t, Miss Martin,” she responded pointedly.

I turned to the man, “What about you? You want to tell me who you’re with?” He looked at Peggy for permission. “I guess not. Come on in then. Let’s get this over with.” I tried to remember those etiquette lessons the studio paid for. “Can I get you anything to drink? Coffee?” I looked at Peggy, “Tea?”

“No thank you, Miss Martin. I wouldn’t want you to have to serve us. I’m sure you’re unaccustomed to that.”

Well that was snarky. I smiled my fakest smile, “It’s no trouble. I assure you.”

“We’re fine thanks,” she smiled, not the smile that used to be for only me, but a fake one. 

“Please have a seat.” I gestured to the sofa. I sat down in what the decorator had called my ‘throne.’ He said when anyone was over, I had to sit there and if that seat was taken I needed to stand. It was some fancy chair made for some Louie king or another they said. I had my doubts. Peggy eyed the sofa like it was going to attack her. It took me half a second to wonder why and then I remembered the last time Peggy and I were in a room with a sofa. My heart started beating in my throat. Non ora. Non riesco a pensarci ora.

“So what can you tell us about Betty?” The man asked.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name.”

“It’s Da…David Philips.”

I remembered it was something with tubas. Philips…Sousa. His name was Sousa. I played along. He didn’t seem to remember me at all. “Nice to meet you, Officer? Philips.”

“Just call me David, ma’am.” He tried to smile kindly at me.

“Fine then. Betty was a sweet girl. I’m not sure exactly what you want to know. I didn’t know her all that well.”

“Where did you meet her?” Peggy asked holding a small notebook and pencil like all the detectives in the movies did.

“At a party.” They always said keep your answers short. Who ‘they’ were I wasn’t sure.

“What was the nature of your relationship?” She asked. I cut my eyes at Sousa.

“David, would you go and check in with the office? I’m expecting an update from them.”

He nodded his head and rose off the sofa. “Miss Martin, nice to meet you. I’ve seen you in some newsreels and of course in the Alan Ladd movie. May I say, you’re even prettier in person?”

“Thank you, David,” I said as I started to get up out of my seat.

“No, please. I can see myself out. Janet, I’m going to run to that pharmacy and soda shop on the corner. You want the usual?”

“Yes. Thank you.”

I wondered briefly if it was the same usual as it was at the automat. I had to bite my tongue to keep from asking what kind of pie he was going to get her. As soon as he closed the door, the silence which had been uncomfortable, got almost unbearable. I waited. I wasn’t going to break the silence. I wasn’t.

I broke the silence. “I didn’t expect to see you at my door.”

“Nor I you, on the other side of it. You look well.”

“As do you. I’m glad to see you’ve recovered.” This was like some horrible stilted dialogue in a B movie. Gosh, she looked good. She looked better than I remembered.

“Yes. I did.” She left the ‘without you’ unsaid but I heard it plain as day.

“So you wanted to know about Betty. What do you need to know exactly?”

“I’m trying to figure out who killed her and why. I need to know everything about her for now. I don’t know what’s relevant and what’s not.”

“Well, Betty was a sweet girl. I met her at a party. We saw each other a few times socially, and once not…socially.” I felt my face flush. I wanted to crawl under this expensive chair and die.

“Did you know she was a call girl?”

“What?!”

“Evidently not.”

“I swear, Peggy…I mean…”

“Peggy’s fine.” She finally smiled at me. It was a bit sad and wistful but it was a smile. 

“Why the fake names?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Of course not.”

“I am sorry if that helps.”

“Me too.” I looked at her just a moment too long and everything that I had tried to bury over the last year came flooding back into my heart and I was only just able to stop it before it leaked out of my eyes. I took a steadying breath and asked, “So, what do you want to know about Betty?”

“I need to know who killed her. So I need to know who had reason to do so. What do you know about her?”

“Not much, like I said. Betty was a sweet kid. She was from Kansas or something. I met her at a…secret party,” I said shyly.

“Secret how?”

“It’s for people like me. Queers or gays or whatever you want to call us.”

“And Betty was…”

“Gay? Yeah, I think so. Or she coulda swung both ways. I’m not sure about that.”

“And you know this…definitively?”

I looked her right in the eye even though it felt like her gaze was going to cut me in half, “Yes.”

She closed her eyes and nodded. “Right. So then, if she knew about people’s proclivities and talked?”

“It would ruin whoever she blabbed about. So yeah, that could be a motive,” I said. Peggy looked impressed. “I might be up for a part in the new Thin Man. I’ve been practicing.”

“I see. So who all would have possibly had motive besides yourself?”

“You think I…”

“Of course not. I’d like to think I have at least some inkling of who you are. Though you have surprised me in the past,” she said and looked more shocked at herself saying it than I did.

And there it was. “Peggy…I…”

“It’s water under the bridge. Think nothing of it.” She looked down into her notebook.

I decided to move the conversation forward. “Well, anyone at any of those parties. Not everyone that’s there is queer but they at least don’t mind it. If that got out, they’d be blackballed. Well, except Dietrich. The rules don’t seem to apply to her.”

“Marlene Dietrich?”

“Yeah.”

“Who else?”

“I’m not naming names, Peggy.”

She sighed. “Fine. What if I came to one of these parties? I haven’t interviewed anyone but you yet. No one knows me.”

“They’re invitation only.”

“Can you get me an invitation?”

“That’s not how these things work.” I could tell she was getting frustrated with me. “I hear Howard is in town.”

“What does that have to do…”

“Is he in town?”

“Yes, but I don’t see what that has to do with…”

“Would he mind escorting you to a party?”

“What are you talking about?”

“To get an invite to the secret party you have to have been at another party first. The Rathbones are throwing a party tomorrow night. You and Howard can come as my guests. I’ll call Ouida and let her know. I’m sure she won’t mind. They throw the most fabulous parties. It’s the best way to get introduced to Hollywood society.”

“You know Basil Rathbone?”

“His wife took a shine to me. Not sure why. But it’ll be Howard that they’ll be excited about. Howard will be your ticket. Then once folks have seen you on Howard’s arm, we can work on getting you invited to the other kind of party.”

“And whose arm will I be on then?”

“Mine of course.”

XXXXXXXXXX

I had called the studio and asked them to do me a favor. Howard Stark had a lady friend he wanted to impress and could they please outfit her for a party at the Rathbones? The studio jumped at the chance to have me photographed with the famous, wealthy and handsome Howard Stark. Ned would have to go of course because the public believed we were minutes away from getting engaged. As predicted, Ouida was more than happy to accommodate two more. She really was great. I almost hated the deception.

I was still getting ready when the studio had a driver drop a tuxedoed Ned off at my house. As was our routine, he fixed himself a drink while I put on the finishing touches. I was just putting my earrings on when the doorbell rang again and I asked Ned if he could answer it. I was expecting Howard. Howard could wait. What I got was a confused Peggy who looked at a very confused Ned. 

Ned called out to me, “Angie, darling. Your guests are here.”

“I’m almost done, snookums,” I said sarcastically, walking into the living room attaching the back of my earring. I looked up and that express train that I had been avoiding hit me square in the chest. There was Peggy Carter in all her glory. She was in a strapless red evening gown that matched her lips. The next time I saw Max Factor, I was going to punch him in the face for creating that lipstick. Her beautiful alabaster skin was there on display. She was wearing a diamond and ruby necklace that Harry Winston would have given his eye teeth for. Her hair was styled more elegantly than I’d ever seen it. Her hands were encased in long red gloves. I was speechless. Utterly incapable of thought. 

She was staring at me and I was staring at her. I was wearing a blue gown that my dresser made me get because she said it brought out my eyes. It was a pale greenish blue and had layers of chiffon. The neckline was a bit more daring than I normally chose but I hadn’t seen Peggy in almost a year and I wanted her to look. She was looking.

“Darling, you want to introduce me to your friend?” Ned asked reminding me that Peggy and I were not alone in the room.

I couldn’t remember what name she was using. Did she tell me? I was sunk. Peggy looked at Ned with narrowed eyes and I wasn’t sure why. Surely, she didn’t think that I…that we…she couldn’t be jealous…after all this time. That was ridiculous but I couldn’t very well tell Peggy the truth about Ned without exposing him so I kept quiet. Oh yeah, I need to introduce them…dagnabit! What was her name?

“Uh…Edward Jackson, this is…” I gestured helplessly toward Peggy.

“Elizabeth Carver,” Peggy supplied extending her hand to Ned. Betty Carver. Just like the Captain America Show. I was never going to escape him. Well, that was like having a bucket of ice water thrown over my head. 

“Pleased to meet you Elizabeth. Please call me Ned,” Ned said as he kissed her hand. Kissed her hand! The son of a bitch barely remembered to open doors for me.

“Ned, and you must call me Liz. Simply everyone does,” She said in an American accent, I finally noticed. It was all I could do not to roll my eyes.

“I presume Howard is in the car waiting?” I managed to say without sounding too petulant I hoped.

“Yes. He’s such a dear,” Peggy said and batted her eyelashes at Ned, “but I bet you’re even sweeter.” He blushed goddamn him.

“I can’t imagine anyone being anything less to you, Miss Carver.”

“Liz.”

“Liz,” he blushed again.

“Uh…let’s get on the good foot, huh? I sort of invited us to this little soiree so let’s try to be on time. Okay?”

“Whatever you say, darling,” Ned responded and managed to sound very much like a put out boyfriend. Maybe I’d sock him in the kisser instead of Max.

The evening had progressed fairly uneventfully until the dancing started. Ned asked me to dance and when his hand slid down my back to help move me toward the dance floor I heard Howard say, “Liz, hon, your fork,” in a weird voice. I turned and saw Peggy gripping her fork like her life depended on it. Ned and I took a few turns on the dance floor until Howard cut in.

We danced companionably for a while until he spoke, “I don’t get you.”

“Sorry?”

“You. I don’t get you. She was crazy about you and you left her. Left her when she was in the hospital.”

I stared at him. Hard. “I heard her. She asked for Steve for a week while she was unconscious. Then when she was awake, I heard her tell you she didn’t know if she wanted to be with me. I saved her a difficult conversation. Don’t imagine that you know me. She’s the one that wanted this.”

“Then you’re a fool,” he said and I, hot-blooded Italian temper and all, slapped him.

“I…I…I’m sorry, Howard,” I stammered. I saw Peggy almost stand up from the table.

He just smiled back at me and extended his arm to escort me back to our seats. “Not the first time I’ve been slapped. Won’t be the last time either. You should talk to her though. Especially before she stabs me or your date with her fork.” He winked at me and I laughed.

“I am sorry,” I said contritely.

“Don’t worry about it. Just keep the evening stabbing free. K?”

“I’ll do my damnedest.”

“That’s all a guy can ask for,” he said as we got to the table. “Ned, how about we go and get the ladies something to drink?”

Ned turned to me, hope alight on his face that the rich and powerful Howard Stark might just ‘swing that way.’ I shook my head slightly at him and he looked momentarily crestfallen but recovered nicely. “Love to. Maybe we can find some cigars around here as well,” he said and stood up to follow Howard to the bar.

She looked at me still, unconsciously, clutching her fork. “What did Howard do?”

“You wanna let go of the cutlery there, Miss Carver? You look a little dangerous.” I looked down at her hand.

She followed my gaze and let go of the fork and put her hands in her lap and began smoothing her dress. She didn’t look up when she asked again, “What did Howard do?”

I waited her out. I waited until those beautiful brown eyes were looking into my own and I said, “It was a misunderstanding. He was just being a good friend to you. Don’t jump on him or nothin’. I’m sorry. Don’t berate him.” At her arched eyebrow I responded, “Elocution lessons.”

She did that thing where she looked like she was trying to read the underside of her eyebrows and then I saw the beginnings of a smile tug at her mouth. She smiled at me then and I coulda run up Mullholland Drive without getting winded. “A fine addition to your vocabulary. What did Howard say then?”

I couldn’t answer her without bawling like a baby. How do you say, ‘he was mad I left you but I left you because you’re still not over a dead man’ without bawling like a baby? “Let’s not talk about that now. Tell me about Elizabeth Carver.”

She struggled a bit but then fell into her role. “She’s a not very well known socialite from the east coast. She is a bit vapid and is using Howard for his money and his connections. She’s a bit of a party girl.”

“Alright. That we can work with. I wish you’d kept the accent though. It would have made it ten times easier.”

“I was not about to be an English Betty Carver.”

“Why choose it at all then?”

“Believe it or not, she’s a real person in the 400.”

“The upper social society of New York? Is she really?”

“Yes, and living in Manhattan. She’s unmarried though and hasn’t been seen at the latest parties so the New York office thought she’d be a good bet. They have her apartment under surveillance just for good measure. Make sure she doesn’t go on any trips out west.”

I got distracted because I saw a way into a party. “Ooh! You see that woman over there? In the boxy dress?”

“The one with the short wavy hair?”

“Go over there and bump into her, make your polite excuses and then make your way back here to me.”

“Anything else?”

“That should do it.”

“Alright.”

She made her way around the room and expertly picked up a not too full plate of hors d'oeuvres and proceeded to back into the wife of one of the most powerful producers in Hollywood. Edith was just as taken with Peggy as I knew she would be. Peggy walked slowly back to our table. I watched Edith watch her walk away. She did it discreetly but I’d stared at Peggy’s backside enough to appreciate a well done job of covert admiration. As expected, Edith approached me as I made my way to the ladies room a few minutes later.

“Gloria, dear, who is that divine creature at your table?”

“That’s Elizabeth Carver. She came with Howard Stark.

“Is she…”she asked and I winked in response.

“Well, I know now is not the best time, but I’m having a small get together at the house day after tomorrow. You should bring your friend if she can be trusted.”

“She can. I’m sure she’ll have a blast.”

“I look forward to it.”

“Me too,” and then we did that weird air kiss cheek thing that I hated. I made my way from the restroom to find that the fellas had rejoined us. I could tell that Ned was tipsy because he was taking turns staring from Peggy to Howard. It looked like he was watching a tennis match only he could see.

“Ned, sweetie, it’s time to get you home.”

“Aww, Glory.”

“Don’t ‘aww, Glory’ me. You have a 5am call time tomorrow. You told me not to let you stay out too late,” I said and he pouted like a child. I turned to Howard, “Howard, if I send the car back…”

“We’re done for the night,” Peggy interjected. “We can drive you home. Can’t we, Howie?”

“Right you are, Liz. Right you are,” Howard answered immediately.

We drove Ned home first. I practically rolled him out of the car and into his house. I hoped he made it to bed okay. Then Howard, Peggy, and Howard’s driver, not Mr. Fancy I noticed, dropped me off at my house. Peggy got out and walked me to the door in a not all that comfortable silence. As we reached it, I turned to her finally and said, “English, you did it. We have a date day after tomorrow.” Then it hit me what I had said. “I mean…”

She reached out and held my hands. “It’s fine, Angie. I know what you mean. How should I dress?”

“It’ll be more casual than this but not by much. No one wants their makeup teams knowing but a lot of them are there anyway so I don’t know why it matters. Think ladies bridge night.”

“I have no idea what that means.”

“Dress. Not a skirt and a blouse. Not floor length. Cocktail dress and the like. You could do pants but that’s kinda Hepburn’s thing.”

“I see. Speaking of dresses, this one suits you. Brings out your eyes.” She swung my hands softly gesturing to my dress.

“Please, English, nobody even looked at me tonight. Not with you and that dress and those lips.”

“I did,” and with that she squeezed my hands one last time and let go. She turned to leave. I thought she was going to say something more but she didn’t. I put my keys in the front door, opened it and turned to watch them drive off into the night. Damn you Peggy Carter. One night and I was back to where I started.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Peggy picked me up two nights later wearing a black cocktail dress with a scoop neck and cap sleeves. Her shoulders were bare again which was doing nothing for my composure. I was wearing something that covered a bit more. It was a satin deep navy blue cocktail dress that had long sleeves and was tailored almost like a tuxedo jacket. It had a sheer front that made it look like I was wearing nothing underneath. I saw Peggy’s eyes widen briefly when she got a load of me. That was worth the effort of getting into this getup.

“English, you look nice,” I managed to say.

“You too.”

“You nervous?”

“A bit.”

“Don’t be. I’ll be right there the whole time.” I smiled at her. Gosh, it was so good to see her. Even this way. Even if she wasn’t really mine. But she was going to go to this party like she was. I needed to prepare her for that. “English, you ever been to one of these parties?”

“A Hollywood socialite party for the gay elite? No.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Well, I did go to an all-girls school, Angie. I didn’t live under a rock.”

“Okay, but these are some of the most beautiful women in the world and they never get to use their…wiles, I guess, on other women so they’re gonna be real forward with ya, English. Real forward. It’s like they’ve turned the radio up on who they are. They’re sort of amplified, maybe is the right way to explain it.”

“I see.” Then she smiled at me, that smile that was almost the one for me but not quite. “But you’ll protect me from the wolves won’t you?”

“I’ll do my best, but Peggy, to convince them, we might have to…show some…affection toward each other. You gonna be okay with that?”

She seemed to consider for a moment and then said, “I believe so. Shall we?” She said as she extended her arm to me. I took it and we went to her waiting car.

I drove because I knew where we were going. Peggy sat in the car in silence. It was a thirty minute ride over there. The house was secluded, far away from the prying eyes of the press. She didn’t say a word for over twenty minutes. I know. I timed it. We used to have dinner together almost every night when we were living in Howard’s place. It never felt like this. 

“Peggy, you okay?”

She seemed to come out of a daze then and looked over at me. “I’m fine.”

I didn’t believe her and I told her so. “You’re not.”

“It’s nothing, Angie. I’m fine. I’ll be fine tonight.”

I decided to let the subject drop. My etiquette lessons said it was the proper thing to do. My Italian upbringing had me wanting to pick at the scab some more and get to the bottom of it. Etiquette won out because after this I’m sure Peggy would go back to her life wherever that was and not give me a second thought. I didn’t need more reasons to love the woman I was doing such a lousy job forgetting about.

We made it into the party without too much fanfare but as I predicted the buzzards were circling. Peggy was like a water buffalo trapped in a swamp to them. They were just waiting for me, the swamp, to leave her alone long enough for them to make their move. It was Dietrich who broke the stalemate.

“Gloria, who is this on your arm?”

“This is Elizabeth Carver. Liz, this is Dietrich,” I say trying not to snarl. How dare she come over here and hit on my girl. Not my girl but she doesn’t know that. Damn.

“No one calls you Marlene?” Peggy asks all flirty.

“No one that I’ll answer to. For you, I might make an exception though,” she said and winked.

“I take it that you’re unescorted tonight then?” I ask, breaking up the flirtation.

“I am. You never know when the interesting people will arrive. I’ll see you ladies later,” She said and sashayed away.

We ended up in a conversation group with Dietrich again a little later in the evening. She was well into her own private bottle when she asked Peggy, “Have you heard Gloria speak Italian yet? She has the most charming accent. Between her Italian and my German, we had a bit of a language barrier but I think we managed quite well.”

I proceeded to choke on my drink and blush furiously along with another starlet standing near us that I’d managed to sleep with on my ‘I need to forget Peggy Carter’ tour of Hollywood bedrooms.

Peggy responded, “Sì ho, e sì che fa.” Then she changed to German. “Aber das ist die einzige Zeit, die Sie erhalten , um mein Deutsch zu hören,” and walked away. Dietrich barked in laughter and I scurried after Peggy.

I found her in an obscenely large guest bath. Pacing. I closed the door. “Uh…Liz? You okay?”

“I am not.”

“Okay. Well…”

“Exactly, how many of your former paramours and peccadilloes am I going to be confronted with this evening?”

“Uh…”

“I assume the little star-struck blonde that also choked on her drink is one, and that German force of nature in there. Who else?”

“Here tonight?”

“No. Let’s revisit your days in New York too.” She was pacing like she was walking a sentry line. Looking at me only when she was facing me but not really seeing me.

“I’m not doing this here. We’re leaving.”

Her head snapped up and she stared at me, “What?”

“I said, we’re leaving. C’mon. It’s a sure invite to the next one. Let’s go,” I said taking her arm a little more forcefully than necessary. 

I made our apologies. Peggy stoic and silent through it all. We drove to my house in stony silence. I parked the car in front of my house and finally spoke to her again. “Get out. You’re coming inside and we’re going to talk about this.” She sat where she was. “Peggy Carter, you at least owe me the courtesy of coming into my house so we can do this in private!” That seemed to snap her out of it.

We walked into the house, I poured us both a tumbler of bourbon on the rocks and I sat down, not on my ‘throne,’ but the sofa. Peggy sat down opposite me. “You want to tell me what that was about back there?” I asked.

“No,” she answered, not looking up from her drink.

“Too bad,” I said and she looked up to glare at me. I took a deep breath and started. “Did Howard talk to you?”

“No. He said I had to ask you. Wanker.”

I laughed. “Sounds like Howard. English, what do you remember about being in the hospital when you came back from Italy?”

“I remember you left me well enough,” she snapped.

“Before that. What were you thinking about?”

“Angie, I was comatose for days. I’m sure I don’t know.”

“I’ll tell you. You called for Steve for a solid week. That was the only word out of your mouth, ‘Steve.’ I sat there by your bedside and wiped the sweat off your brow and told myself I could live with it. I mean you were in love with Captain America. Anyone, anyone would be second best. I loved you enough for both of us. That’s what I told myself anyway.”

“Angie…”

“No don’t. If I don’t get this out now, I never will. Then this guy came into the diner. He was a talent scout. Said I’d be perfect in the new Alan Ladd movie. I took his card and the train ticket just to prove to you that it had actually happened. I wasn’t going to go, honest. But when I went to the hospital to tell you, I heard you talking to Howard.” I had to look down at my drink to continue, “I heard Howard say that I wasn’t Steve and then I heard you say ‘I don’t know if I want to be with her’ and I felt like somebody ripped out my heart.  
“I couldn’t have you stay with me out of what? Obligation? I couldn’t. So I took my ticket and my chance at what I always thought I wanted my dream to be, and tried my damnedest to get over you. So yeah, I slept with Dietrich, who I’ve had a crush on since I saw Morocco in High School, but I thought about you the whole time. Every time some woman has touched me even if I didn’t want to, I imagined it was you.  
“You’ve ruined me Peggy Carter. I can’t have you, and you’re all I’ve ever wanted. So what if I have, what did you call them? Paramours and peccadilloes? So what. I’m just tryin’ to get through the day without going crazy.”  
I finally look at her then and continue, “And then you march back into my life without a so much as a ‘by your leave’ and I knew by the look on your face the first time you saw me that you’ve never looked for me. You had no idea who Gloria Martin was when you rang that doorbell. You couldn’t’ve cared less about where I was and what I was doing.”

“That’s not true.”

I continued on, “And then you stand there tonight judging me…”

“I said,” she voiced more strongly, “that’s not true.”

“What’s not true?”

“You destroyed me, Angie. I thought I knew what heartache was when I lost Steve, but his death…I could rationalize that. He didn’t want to do it. But all I knew was that you left me. You left me because Hollywood called, because of my job, my duty, who I was deep down, because ‘we just wouldn’t work out.’ Why, why didn’t you talk to me about what you thought you heard?

“Because…I didn’t want you to lie to me, or more importantly, yourself.”

She got down on her knees in front of me on the sofa then and took my hands out of my lap, “Beautiful angel, that trip to Italy scared me. I didn’t want to do to you what Steve had done to me. He was a much better person than I am and I know he tried his best but he failed. He failed and he was a super-soldier. So how could I fare better? I didn’t want to put you through that pain. That conversation you overheard with Howard was about Howard telling me not to wait. Not to put off being with you. You and I were not Steve and me. There was no war. There was no reason to wait he was saying. The part of the conversation you missed was, ‘I don’t know if I want to be with her if I could hurt her like that. She deserves so much better.’”

“English,” I said tears rolling down my face.

“I had decided then to limit my field work. That night when Jarvis brought your letter, they…well they had to sedate me to keep me from leaving.”

“Oh, Peggy.”

“But after, I thought that you had just done what I asked you to do. That you had decided that you couldn’t be with me. So I was going to honor your wish. I wouldn’t look for you no matter how tempting it would prove to be in the coming months.  
“When I first saw you, I wanted to be angry at you but I was just so happy to see you after all this time. I even had Sousa find me a copy of that damn Alan Ladd movie so that I could watch it at Howard’s.”

I smiled finally. “Did you like it?”

“Bit of a far-fetched plot don’t you think? Waitress who falls in love with a secret agent.”

“Ah, but the important part is that the secret agent isn’t in love with the waitress. He’s still in love with someone else.”

She looked into my eyes then and cupped my cheek, “This one’s not. I’m still in love with you Angie Martinelli. Still, after all this time. I never stopped.”

“Eng…lish,” I said brokenly and pulled her up onto the sofa and into a kiss. We were both crying too hard for the kiss to be very passionate but it was the sweetest kiss I’d ever shared with anyone. I pulled back and said, “Do you mean it, English?”

“Every word.”

“I don’t want you to settle.”

She made a face. “Settle for what? Not Steve?” 

I nodded in response and said, “I’m not asking you not to love him, English. I don’t want that. I’m not asking you that. I just don’t want to fall short. I don’t want you to be disappointed that I’m not him.”

“Oh, my beautiful angel, I could never be that. You’re two very different people. You healed my heart, darling. My broken, battered heart. You put the pieces back together so that I could love again. How could you ever think that you wouldn’t be enough? I’ll always love Steve. He will always have a place there, but my heart belongs to you now. I told you as much the day I left for Italy.”

“I would have remembered that, English.”

“I believe that I told you I was all yours.”

"Prove it."

"Be careful what you wish for," She said as she grinned wickedly at me then leaned in for a kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I may have found some plot lying around. Angie rambles. Old Hollywood. Stars. Gangsters. More parties. And some Cartinelli sex if you're good.

I woke up the next morning in my own bed, alone.  Last night, I was ready to do my best impression of Clark Gable in Gone with the Wind on Peggy and carry her bridal style up the staircase to my bedroom, or better yet, let Peggy carry me.  I’ve seen her do push-ups.  Hefting me up a staircase was right in her wheelhouse.  I had to close my eyes and try to control the shudder that ran through me at the thought.  If last night was any indication, there was not going to be any relief for my condition any time soon.  It turns out, that Peggy Carter is every inch a lady.  She can kill a man with her bare hands, but she’s a lady through and through.  I’m going to have to start prayin’ again on the regular.  I’m going to need all the help I can get.  Because, God Almighty, if I don’t have my way with Peggy Carter soon, it’s going to drive me insane.

You wait on a girl for the better part of two years.  Wait, make that _the_ girl.  You wait and then the heavens open up and the seas part and you think, _this is it!  This is my shot!_ Only to be brought back down to earth like Icarus.  Did I mention the studio also hired a cultural instructor for some of the starlets?  I’ve been her star pupil.  It didn’t hurt that she was English and talked a bit like Peggy.  She didn’t have Peggy’s gams, but they didn’t look that bad wrapped around my head.  Probably shouldn’t tell Peggy that. 

Oh, Mother Mary, I know this isn’t the kind of thing that a good girl should pray about, but please keep me from hurting Peggy any more.  I knew Peggy was the jealous type.  Howard told me about the time she shot at Captain America.  He was bragging about how good the shield worked and it slipped.  God help me if Peggy was confronted with more of my ex-lovers.  I didn’t happen to have a Vibranium shield laying around.  I felt a sudden kinship with Steve Rogers, one I’d never really felt before.  I mean I knew that he loved her and I loved her, but who wouldn’t love Peggy Carter given half a chance?  No.  I felt close to the man because now I knew what it was like to disappoint her.  From what I knew about him, from Peggy, from Howard, from all the news reels, that must’ve been harder than fighting the Nazis.  I, myself, would go toe to toe with Mussolini rather than see that look on her face again.

I went from the lowest low to the highest high and back again last night.  We necked like teenagers for what seemed like a long time and hardly any time at all.  Peggy smiled more than I’ve ever seen her smile.  I made her giggle.  I made Peggy Carter giggle.  I don’t think you heard me.  I. Made. Peggy. Carter. Giggle.  She has this sensitive spot about halfway down her neck and when I hit it just right, well, you don’t need to know that come to think of it.  Anyway, at some point last night she pulls back, her eyes dark with want and her tongue traces over her bottom lip then she hesitates and bites it and I coulda died a happy woman.

“Darling angel, I have to go.”

“Wha’?”  Admittedly, I was havin’ trouble paying attention to the words coming out of those lips ‘cause all I could think was how ‘thoroughly kissed’ they looked just now.  I had made Peggy look like that.  I blinked stupidly.

She leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to my lips.  “I said, I have to go.”

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

“You know that’s not my sense of humor.”

“English!  I’ve got two years of pent up…you can’t just…”

“Darling, if tonight was any indication, I don’t think you have pent up anything.”  I opened my mouth to say something and stopped.  What could I say?  She closed it gently with her first finger.  “Who knew that the two people closest to me would be slaves to their baser instincts?  Odd, that.”

“I think I’m insulted.  I’m assuming you just compared me to Howard Stark.”

“Well, darling, if the proverbial shoe fits.”

“That’s a rotten thing to say, English.”

“Howard is a good man.”  At my look she said, “He is.  I trust him.”

“So you’re leaving me because you got load of some of the gals I was with?” I couldn’t keep the hurt out of my voice.

“No, angel.  I’m leaving because I don’t want anyone thinking I stayed the night.  I’m thinking of your reputation.  I’m here in Howard’s car.  We left that party and I wasn’t checking to see if anyone followed us.  I’m going to continue to pursue this investigation as this, Liz Carver.  The further she is away from you the safer you are.”

“And the more danger you’re in.  No dice.  I’m in like Flynn for this one.”

She closed her eyes and tilted her head at me.  “I’m assuming Errol?”

“The one and the same.”

“You’re going to have to educate me, darling.  Sometimes your American idioms escape me.  You’re not saying that you slept with him too are you?”

“What? No.”

“I felt the need to ask.  Go on.”

“I swing one way, Pegs.  One way.  Besides, from what I hear, he shared a house with that David Niven fella.  Not sure what all went on out there but if ya ask me, he’s tryin’ too hard.  Ya know?”

“Are you saying that Errol Flynn, is a homosexual?”

“Nope.  I’m just sayin’.”

“I’m so confused.”

“Me too, English.” I paused and thought back over the conversation, “I think you were sayin’ something along the lines that I was a slut.”

“I did no such thing.”

“Sure sounded like it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“S’Okay,” I said and waved my hand to brush it away.

“No.  It’s not.  I am sorry.  You didn’t owe me a thing.  I shouldn’t hold anything against you that you did while we were apart.  However, I feel that I should point out that, it’s been brought to my attention before that I can be a…jealous person,” she said and I snorted.  Then wisely kept my mouth shut.  “I see.  You share this opinion then?” she asked.  I just nodded.  It felt safer.  She continued.  “Fine.  Explain the expression ‘In like Flynn’.”

“It just means, ‘I’m in’ for whatever this is.  I mean you’re not gettin’ rid of me.”

“Angel…”

“No.  You don’t get to ‘Angel’ me on this, Peggy Carter.  I love you.  I love everything about you.  I know that the danger is just as much a part of you as that delicious accent of yours.  If I have to live with that, the fact that you live your life in almost constant danger, you can deal with me helping with this one.”

“I don’t…”

“Oh no.  This is not negotiable.  I can help with this one.  You’re not getting’ rid of me, English.”

“Darling…”

“No!  You’re not sweetalkin’ your way outta this one!  I’m in.  I know the folks here.  I can help.  I know the people you’re gonna be dealin’ with.  I know how to get you inta the places that you need to get into to find out who killed poor Betty.  You ain’t getting’ rid of me.  Deal with it,” I said and kissed her.

“Fine.”

“What was that, English?  I think I missed it,” I smirked.

She huffed.  “I said, ‘Fine.’”

“English!  We’re gonna be workin’ together!   Like Nick and Nora Charles!”

“Wait.  In this scenario am I William Powell or Myrna Loy?” She arched an eyebrow.

“Obviously, you’re William Powell but with better legs.  You have to be Nick.  He’s the more experienced investigator.”

“Isn’t he also a drunk in these movies?”

“He likes to drink, yeah.”

“So why is he the Thin Man and not the ‘drunk man’?”

“He’s not the Thin Man.  The Thin Man was the first case.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’ll teach it all to you.  In fact, we can start tonight.”  I smiled my best smile.

“Tonight, I’m going to go back to Howard’s.”

“English, I can make it worth your while if you don’t.”

She placed a gentle kiss to my lips.  “Of that, I’ve no doubt, but I need to go.”

“Need to or want to?”

“I can’t think of anything I’ve _wanted_ to do less.”

“So stay, English,” I wrapped my arms around her neck and placed a gentle kiss just below her ear.  “Stay,” I whispered, letting her hear the want in my voice while I kissed down her neck.

“I swear.  You could work for HYDRA.  You enjoy torturing me.” Her throat hummed against my lips as she tilted her head back to give me better access.

“Since you seem to be enjoying it, I’m gonna take that as a compliment,” I said as I smiled against her neck.

“Purely reflex, Darling,” she said as she moved back.  I let her go.  She held my face in her hands, “I’m going to go now.  If I stay, I’m putting you in danger and I won’t have that.”  Something crossed her face.  Something I couldn’t quite decipher.  “If you do help me, you have to do what I say, when I say it.  No questions.”

“Ooh! I can work with that.”  I winked.

“You’re incorrigible.”  She smiled back at me indulgently.  Then continued.  “I mean it, Angie.  I’ll accept nothing less.  If I say you stay, you stay.  If I say you leave, you leave and so on.”

“Yes, dear,” I said and rolled my eyes.

“I mean it.”

“Yes, Agent Carter.”

She arched that eyebrow at me again.  “I suppose that’s as good as I’m going to get.”

“What happens next?”

“I guess that’s up to you.  We left the party early tonight.  How do we get me back into that world?”

“I have to go to work tomorrow but it’s a late call.  We’re shooting at night.  So lunch?  You can come pick me up in Howard’s flashiest car.  We’ll go to the Derby.”

“The Brown Derby?”

“Well, I sure ain’t talkin’ about the races at Hollywood Park, English.”

“And what does this accomplish?”

“If you’re dead set on leavin’ tonight, you should do that now.  We’ll go over it all in the morning.  Pick me up at eleven.”  I get up on my tiptoes and kiss her on the forehead.

“As you wish, my darling.”  She leaned down, kissed me on the forehead in return and left.

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I was still in my dressing gown getting ready when my doorbell rang.  10:30. I have never known Peggy Carter to be early for anything.  Punctual.  Yes.  She kept military time.  Never early.  Figures.  Thank God I’d already put my makeup on.

I tightened the silk gown around me and walked down my stairs.  I smiled thinking about why I bought it.  I bought it because it reminded me of the one Peggy had.  I thought about her every time I put it on.  It was only right that she see me in it.  I looked through the peephole and saw her standing there in a button-up white blouse and blue wide-legged pants.   She smiled like she knew I was there.  She probably did.  I opened the door.

“You’re early,” I said as I opened the door and turned my back to go upstairs again.

“It seems so,” she said and I heard the smile in her voice.

“Why?” I asked not turning back around.  I can hear her following me.

“Happenstance?”

“Sing, English.  Sing like a canary,” I ordered as I turned around on the top of the staircase.  I noticed two things simultaneously.  Peggy’s shorter than I was with me standing on the landing and her still on the steps, and I caught her staring where my ass would have been.  I smirked and put my arms around her neck.  “I’m waiting.”

She blushed.  She blushed and smiled shyly.  “I’ve missed watching you get ready in the mornings.”  She bowed her head.  “I didn’t want to miss it again if I didn’t have to.”

“You are such a romantic sap!  Who knew?”

“Not I.”

I couldn’t stand it anymore.  I kissed her gently.  “I’ll confess.  I did,” I said against her lips.

“Did you now?”  I felt her smile against my lips.

“Well, yeah.”

“And just how did you know this?”

“I’ve always thought so.  At least you’ve always been that way with me.  Just little things, but they added up.”

“For example?”  She leaned back slightly and I released her from my arms.

“Well, when we lived at the Griffith, you hated schnapps but you drank it anyway for me.  When we were at Howard’s you didn’t know how to make a decent cup of coffee but you tried for me.  So I could have coffee when I woke up in the mornings.”

“You didn’t like my coffee?  You wound me!”  She put her hand on her chest dramatically.

I rolled my eyes and continued.  “You’d leave me notes if you were going to be away for work or you’d call when you wouldn’t be home for dinner.  You’d come by the automat and see me just to say ‘hi’.  You were always doing a million little things to let me know I mattered to you.  That you thought about me before you thought about you.”

“I do you know.”

“I know.  C’mon, I’ll show you my bedroom.”  I took her hand and I could feel her hesitation.  “I’ll be good, English.  I promise.  I won’t offend your ladylike sensibilities.”

“Excuse me?”

“I won’t take advantage of you,” I said as I pulled her along.

“Take _advantage_ of me?” She said in a too high voice.

“Maybe that wasn’t the best way to put that.”

We walk into my bedroom and she turns me around.  “I don’t fall into your bed immediately and you think I’m some sort of prude?”

“That’s not what I meant.  I just…I don’t want to, to pressure you.”  I let go of her hand and walk over to my dressing table.  I look at her in the mirror.  “Peggy, I’ll wait for you as long as I need to.  I got the feeling last night that you left less because of any possible danger and more because you needed space, and that’s okay.  I’m not going anywhere this time.  I promise.”

“How big of you.”

I turned to face her.  There was something in that tone.  Something dangerous but I didn’t know what.  “I didn’t mean…”

She held up her hand to cut me off.  “You need to get ready.  I’ll sit right here and try not to cower in fear.”

“English…”

“I don’t want to hear it.  Get ready.”

I decide to leave it for now and walk into my closet and select a blue gingham sailor dress with scoop neck and white bow.  It should be both dressy and casual enough for lunch at the Derby.  I can’t dress up too much more than Peggy because it will send the wrong message, and while I don’t mind doing what I can to help her with this investigation, I can’t have that big mouth Hedda Hopper thinkin’ I’m a queer.  She’ll ruin me just because she can.  What I can do, is set it up so that it looks like Peggy/Liz is in town and looking for a good time.  Get her and Howard invited to a few more parties.  That’s where all the business is done in this town.  Well, there and the casting couches.  I check my stocking seams in the mirror.  One of the lights went out yesterday and I haven’t had time to replace it.  I can’t see well enough.

I walk out of the closet and turn, “English, can you check my seams?  I can’t tell if they’re straight or not.”

I feel her right behind me almost instantly.  She lowers herself on to her knees and traces her fingers up the backs of my legs so slowly that I start to pray the Our Father in Italian in my head, over and over.  She pushes the back of my dress up and unhooks the stockings from my garter belt.  Then attaches them again.  She places a kiss at the top of each stocking.  I suck in an uneven breath and start to tremble.  Actually, tremble.

“Turn around,” she orders.  I do and she pushes my skirt up in the front and unhooks the front of the stockings.  “Hold this.”  She holds up my skirt and I take it in both hands.

I abandon the Our Father and start on the Hail Mary.  Evidently, out loud.  “Ave Maria, piena di grazia…”

I feel her lips on the front of my thighs as she reattaches the stockings and then kisses them each in turn.  She smirks up at me, “Are you okay, darling?” She asks in English and then switches to Italian.  “Si tende a parla italiano quando siete eccitati.”

I take a deep breath and count to ten.  I have to concentrate my entire being on speaking in English because Peggy hasn’t stopped kissing the inside of my thighs.  If she doesn’t stop, she’s gonna know exactly how much I want her.  I feel the throb between my thighs ache painfully.  “English, what do you think you’re doing?”

She stands and looks me in the eye.  Then leans over and brushes a kiss along my jaw working her way to my right ear.  “I want you to wear those today and think about me.  Think about me touching you this morning, here, with no one around.  I want you to think about my mouth on you every time you feel those garters and where they are.  I want to be with you all day.  I want you to think about how much I want you all day.”

“Tease,” I manage to breathe out.

“I assure you, I am not.”  She turned away muttering and I managed to catch.  “…advantage of me, honestly…”

I start praying again.  I’m not sure if it was in English or Italian, out loud, or in my head.  I just knew that I needed some sort of intercession on my behalf.  If Peggy took what I said as a challenge, I was in serious, serious trouble.

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

 

When we arrived at the Derby, I noticed Hedda Hopper wasn’t there but before I could breathe a sigh of relief, none other than Louella Parsons walked in right behind us.  I wasn’t enough of a draw for her normally but it seemed that Peggy had peaked her interest. 

“Gloria, darling, so good to see you here,” she leaned in for the air kiss.

I complied and extended the expected pleasantry, “Louella, you look gorgeous.  Where did you get those shoes?  They are so elegant.”

“I’ll never tell, dear.”  Then she looked at Peggy expectantly.

I knew what I had to do.  I looked over at Peggy and could see that she understood.   “Louella Parsons, this is Elizabeth Carver.  She’s here in town at Howard Stark’s invitation.  I’m just keeping her entertained briefly while he’s at the office today.”

“Pleased to meet you,” Peggy said extending her hand.

“You all attended the Rathbones’ party together, didn’t you?” Louella asked.

“We did,” I confirm.

“Dear, I had no idea you knew Howard!” Louella exclaims.

“Oh, yes!” I reply vaguely.  I wasn’t going to give her an inch.

Thankfully, Peggy isn’t an idiot.  “Ms. Parsons, I just love it here.  It’s so different from New York.  Are there any places you can recommend to me?  Howard is just so busy, you know.  He’s starting a studio.  I don’t really understand it all but Miss Martin here has been gracious enough to show me around a bit.”

“Well, dear, you really lucked out.  Gloria here is one of our rising stars.  She would be a much better tour guide than little ol’ me.”

“I doubt that, Ms. Parsons.  I think if anyone knows everything about this town, it would be you,” Peggy hits her where she lives.  I can see that the old bitty is pleased.

She smiles when she looks at me, “I might know a thing or two our young, Miss Martin does not.”  I see Cary Grant walk back from the restroom.  Louella sees him too.  Bigger fish.  “Well, I’ll leave the two of you to your lunch plans.  Nice to meet you Miss Carver.  Gloria,” she says as she nods at me and walks away.

“That was…” Peggy begins.

“Not here,” I whisper.

Finally, we’re shown to a table.  Because I’ve made it a point to be nice to the staff we’re shown to the best table.  Not the one in the middle of the room so everyone can see you, but the booth in the corner.  Where everyone can see you, but you can see them coming, and you can speak without someone sneaking up on you.  I thank Doug, the waiter, by name and he smiles as he takes our drink orders then leaves us to get ourselves situated.

“Are you sure you’ve never been in the intelligence service?” Peggy whispers to me and gestures to our booth.

“You make nice with the wait staff and they take care of ya.  I learned that from you,” I winked at her.  She smiled back at me.  I crossed my legs under the table and I feel my garters against my thighs.  The flush starts in my chest and works up my neck.  I chance a look at Peggy and I can see that she _knows._   “Damn you,” I mumble looking down at my menu.  She just laughs.  I love Peggy’s laugh.  It’s almost worth it.

We talk about nothing and everything over lunch.  Doug brought our food and we fell back into old patterns.  I try my hardest not to make us seem like any more than acquaintances but I’m not sure that we succeeded.  Anyone could tell that we got along like a house on fire, as Peggy liked to say.   I’m just about to say something to Peggy about it when I see someone that I had hoped to never see again walk in through the front door.  He was with George Raft and unfortunately, George and I had hit it off at a party talking about New York.    George waved and began to walk over to us.

“Gloria! So good to see you here!” George says.

“George, this is an unexpected pleasure,” I respond.

“Gloria, this is Benjamin Siegel.  Ben, this is Gloria Martin.”

“Mr. Siegel, George Raft, this is Elizabeth Carver,” I make the last introduction.

“Are you an actress, Miss Carver?” George asks.

“No, no, I’m afraid not,” Peggy responds batting her eyelashes.

“Miss Martin, have we ever met before?” Siegel asks me.

“She’s from New York, Ben,” George answers him.

“You know you kinda look like a skinny little kid I used to know…not…Gloria…” Siegel puts his fingers under his chin and strokes it thoughtfully.

“Mr. Siegel, I think you knew my uncles Al and Sal.”

“Yeah!  Oh!  Wow!  I have to tell you, you turned out nice…Gloria.”

“Thank you, Mr. Siegel.  I have to say, you’ve done really well for yourself too,” I smile at him like I would a dog that would attack me.  I feel Peggy’s hand on my knee under the table to steady me.

“Ben, aren’t you having a party sometime next week at your house?” Raft asks.

“Yeah, Yeah, Gloria, you have to come and bring your friend.”

“She’s here at Howard Stark’s invitation.  I’m just showing her around as a favor,” I respond.  I don’t want Peggy anywhere near Siegel.  She, of course, has other ideas.

“I’d love to.  I’m sure Howard would want to come though.  Is that alright?” She asks smiling with those lips that make strong men weak.  Strong women too.  I want to agree with her even though I know what a rotten idea it is.

“We can put up with Stark for the night but tell ‘em that he better not have a wandering eye like last time, but I’m sure with you on his arm, you’ll keep him in line,” Siegel says laughing.

“Thankfully, that’s not my job.  Howard is responsible for his own behavior.  I’m not his mother,” Peggy snarks.  Siegel and Raft both throw their heads back and laugh so hard people start staring.  Louella Parsons looks like her mouth is watering. 

“Miss Carver, it’s been a pleasure,” George leans down and kisses her hand.  “Next Friday at Ben’s.  We’d love to have you.  You know it, right, Gloria?”

“I do.”

“See ya then,” Siegel says as they leave.

Peggy hisses at me, “You know Bugsy Siegel?!”

“Jeepers, English!  Don’t call him that!  I’d like to live through the entrée” I hiss back.

“You will explain,” she says as she stares at me hard.

“In the car on the way to the studio.  Eat your food,” I order and begin to eat mine in earnest.  Peggy eats then with more table manners than I’ve ever seen her show.  I never really thought about the fact that she could if she wanted to.  Normally, she eats like someone’s about to take it away from her.  I chuckle to myself.  Then I adjust my legs and my garters ghost across my skin again and I’m not thinking about Bugsy Siegel or food any more.  I decide to enjoy it while I can.

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I talk Peggy into letting me drive Howard’s XK 120 Jaguar.  It wasn’t supposed to be out for another year but Howard had gotten a hold of a prototype and Peggy liberated it from his garage because it was British.  It cornered like a dream.  I put her through her paces, I didn’t get her up to her top speed, 120mph, hence the name, but I got close, and oh I wanted one.  I wanted one bad.  I drove us out to an overlook and parked.  I wasn’t going to be able to put this off forever but before I did tell my tale, I was going to get some revenge.  Between this morning, and lunch, and the car, I was so wound up if I didn’t let off some steam, I was gonna blow my top.  I leaned over and kissed Peggy, hard.  I wound my hand in her hair, my other hand on her waist, and pulled her close to me.  She kissed me back but kept her hands on my shoulders.

I let her go.  “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.  You want to talk about it?”

“I don’t, but I suppose I need to tell you about it.”

“Would it be easier if I asked you questions?”

“No.  Just gimme a sec.”

“Take all the time you need, darling,” she said as she took my hand in both of hers.

We sat there for a few minutes while I gathered my thoughts and my courage.  “So, we’ve never talked too much about my family…”

“Nor mine.”

“No.  I don’t guess we have.”  I smile at her because I know she’s trying to make this as easy as possible on me.  “My pa is a brick mason.  Same as his father before him.  He knew a trade when he came to America.  He always said there was no substitute for hard work and respect for your craft.  That’s why he wanted me to go to secretarial school.  He wanted me to have a trade that was more stable than acting, said it always kept him out of trouble.”

Peggy just smiled at me knowingly.  I continued, “But my ma’s family…my ma’s family, well her brothers really, are part of the Cosa Nostra.  You know what that is, English?”

“I have a vague notion.  The Mafia?  The Five Families?”  I just nodded my head in response.  “So your uncles they were associates of Bugsy’s?”

“Gah! Do _not_ call him that!  He scares the beejeezus outta me, English.  He _hates_ that nickname.  Hates it.  He’s a wild card on a good day.  Don’t piss him off.”

“What do you call him?”

“My responses to him tend to be along the lines of, ‘Yes sir, Mr. Siegel, sir.’”

“What do you mean a wild card?”

“He’s unpredicatable.  You never knew what was going to set him off.  When I was a kid, I never liked being around him unless my uncles were around.  He gave me the heebie jeebies.  There was just something off about him.  He’s better at hidin’ it now, or I’ve gotten used to it.”

“No, I definitely felt a chill going up my knickers.  It’s still there.”

“Is it wrong that I want to know more about the sensations in your knickers?” I couldn’t help but ask.

She grinned.  “Nice try Miss Martinelli, but I really need to hear more about you and Benjamin Siegel.”

“Better.”

“I can be taught.  Contrary to popular belief.”

“Um hum.  Anyway, I look just like my ma.  I’m sure he knew exactly who I was.  So he knows that Gloria Martin is actually ‘skinny kid’ Martinelli.  I’m pretty sure he doesn’t remember my first name but he knows who I am alright.”

“Is that going to cause trouble for you?”

“Nah.  No more than if anybody from the old neighborhood came here.  Everybody in this town has a past.  I ain’t worried about it.”

“Alright, but you’ll tell me if that changes.  I won’t have anyone or anything hurting you.”

“English, you gotta stop bein’ so perfect.”  I leaned over and kissed her on the lips.  It was soft, tentative and as slow as I could make it.

She spoke softly against my lips.  “Just how private is your overlook?”

“Not private enough for what I’m thinkin’”

“Ahem,” Peggy cleared her throat.  “I see.”

“You started it with your little garter trick this morning.”

“Darling, you started it eleven and one-half months ago on a couch at Howard’s.  Don’t blame this on me.” And there went both eyebrows.

“Is that so?”

“It most assuredly is.”

“Fine.  I can take credit for this.”

“Don’t you mean blame, darling?”

“English, anything that makes me feel this good is not a bad thing.  So there is no blame to be had.”

“I see,” she chuckled.  “A very healthy attitude.  Now, when do you have to be on set?”

“In about an hour.  I’ll be in makeup for the first then we’ll be shooting from late afternoon until they get the shot they want.”

“What’s your role?”

“Oh, I’m a chorus girl who gets to dance and sing a number with the male leads.”

“And who are the male leads?”

“Bob Hope and Bing Crosby.”

“Oh Angie how wonderful!”  She clasped her hands together.

“English, I make out with Alan Ladd and you don’t so much as bat an eye but Hope and Crosby make you clap your hands?”

“I have a soft spot for Mr. Hope.  He saw almost as much of the European theater as I did.  He was there for a USO show about a month after…after we lost Steve.  He was the first relief the 107th had from that crushing grief.  The first relief I had from it.”

I want to take that sad faraway look out of her eyes.  I offer what I can and ask, “You wanna meet him?”

“As Elizabeth Carver?  I think not.”

“Oh, I forgot about that.”

“Yes.  Damned inconvenient.”

“How about when this is all over I introduce you?  He’s pretty great.”

“We’ll see.”

It hit me then that after this if Peggy ever did meet anyone in my life, we’d either have to explain Elizabeth Carver away or she’d never be able to actually be Peggy.  Damn.  It was too soon to ask Peggy what all this meant.  Whether we had a future together.  I mean she said she loved me.  That had to mean that she wanted one, right? 

“Darling Angel, stop.”

“Stop what?”

“You’re thinking too much.  We’ll work it out.”

“Come with me this afternoon for a bit.  I have a really great dance number that we’re shooting.  Hope and Crosby won’t be there for a while.  We’re shooting a moonlight number later on the backlot.”

“I really shouldn’t.”

“Please, English.  I just need to keep an eye on ya.  Make sure that you’re not in danger.  At least for a little while.”  I batted my eyelashes and used my best pout.

“Oh, all right.”  She rolled her eyes.  “You won’t always get your way you know.”

“I know.”  I smiled coyly.  “I know when to pick my battles.”

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I wasn’t sure what take we were on.  I just knew that Peggy sitting over there by the director was making me more nervous than it should have.  God, she looked so gorgeous and she was looking at me like she wanted to make good on what she started this morning.  I had changed into my costume for the scene.  It was a barely there number that was suitable for a chorus girl.  I was center stage and tapping my heart out to no avail.

The director finished speaking with the cinematographer and the cameraman and called us to attention.  “All right folks, let’s get this right this time.  Gloria, whenever you’re ready.”

I nodded my head, waited a beat and delivered my line to the actor playing the piano player.  “Hey Steve, make with the 88s over there.  And a one, two, a three and go.”  Miracle of miracles, Patsy hit her mark and we all tapped in unison.  We shot the whole thing.  One long take.  Kick line and everything.

“And cut.  Okay everybody, take five.  We’ll set up for the next dance number,” the director said.

I walked over to Peggy who gave me a subtle once-over.  “Well, is it as magical as you thought it would be?”  I asked.

“You are.  You’re wonderful, Miss Martin.”  She quickly says as some of the girls go walking by.  Patsy eyes Peggy like she’s a steak in the butcher’s window.  I’ve never liked Patsy.  I narrow my eyes at her in warning.

“Well, I’m glad you liked it.  I know it can be boring watching other people work and never getting to participate,” I say and smile.

“Hmm…yes…be that as it may, Howard is expecting me at the office.  He wants me to do some research on a friend from New York,” Peggy looks at my lips subconsciously I think.  I wonder if she knows she’s doing it.  I have to be careful here at the studio.  I clear my throat and she comes out of her trance.  “You really are marvelous.  I know you’re doing what you were born to do.”

“Thanks, Liz.  I’ll have Ernie escort you off the lot.  It can get confusing if you’re not familiar with the layout.”  I nod my head to let her know this isn’t really negotiable.  The studio doesn’t like unescorted visitors on the lot.

“That would be wonderful.”

“Ernie!”  I call.  He runs over.  He’s a great kid.  He’s a glorified gopher but I’m pretty sure he’ll keep Peggy out of trouble at least until she gets off the lot.  “Would you show Miss Carver here the way off the lot?  She’s in that fancy Jaguar parked in lot D.”

“Yes, Miss Martin.  Right away.”

“Thanks.”  I say to him and I look at Peggy one last time before she leaves.  “I’ll let you know about that party, okay?  Make sure Howard can come?”

“Of course,” she responds and then Ernie escorts her out of my sight.

The shoot lasts all night.  At least for me.  Hope and Crosby, I’m sure, got home at a reasonable hour, but when you’re trying to make it, you’re available.  The studio car drops me off on my doorstep at 5 a.m.  The director, pompous ass that he is, finally got the shot he wanted.  Why we couldn’t have gotten the same look on any one of a hundred sound stages I have no idea but he wanted the moon just so.  “Carogna!” I say under my breath as I walk in my front door.

I notice that there’s a person sitting in the dark on my sofa.  “I don’t know who you are but my boyfriend is right behind me,” I say as calmly as I can in the circumstances.

They turn on the light and it’s Peggy, in coveralls.  “That’s going to put a damper on my plans for the evening, darling.”

“Dio dannato!  You scared the shit outta me, English!”  I close the door.  Then I realize what I’ve said, and I cross myself muttering the Our Father for forgiveness.

“Who did you think I was, my darling?”

“I didn’t know.  Maybe some of Siegel’s torpedoes.”

“Yes, well.  As you can see, I am not.”

“Why are you sitting here in the dark?”

“You weren’t home and you didn’t leave any lights on.  I’m not supposed to be here.  So I waited in the dark.”

“Peggy, not that it’s not wonderful to see you but why are you waiting for me at 5 in the morning in the dark?”

“We talked about the dark.”

“Yeah, yeah.  Quit stalling.  I’ve had the longest day.  You want anything to drink?  I’m going to have one.”

“I think that’s best.”

I pour us two drinks and sit on the sofa with her.  She sips on hers then looks at me.  She begins.  “I think that Benjamin Siegel is in league with Leviathan.  I think that his crime syndicate has been selling them weapons and vice versa.  I’m pretty sure your…friend, Betty, was a prostitute working for his organization.”

“Whoa.  Whoa. Whoa.  You think he’s a traitor?!”

“You seem surprised.”

I think about it.  “Yeah.  I guess I am.  I mean he’s definitely a different sort but I never thought of him as a traitor.  Murderer, yes.  Traitor, no.”

She leans over to me and kisses me then.  “That’s one of the things I love so much about you.  You try to see the best in everyone.”  Then she sighs.  “Who is this actress he’s seeing?  Virginia Hill?”

“Nobody really.  At least not in the movies.  She has ties to the mob and no one wants to make her mad.  I think she helps run things maybe.”

“And how do you know this?”

“You pick up things.  What makes you think he’s connected to your Leviathan?”

“He had an affair with the wife of an Italian Count.”

“Dorothy, yeah.”

“Do you know her?”

“I know of her.  Go on.”

“Well he went with her to Italy in 1938 and met Mussolini”

“Wait. Wait. Wait.  Ben Siegel met Il Duce?”

“Yes and evidently met some Nazis while he was there.  Goring and Goebbels if the reports are accurate.  He didn’t like them, apparently, and offered to kill them.”

I shook my head.  “I wouldn’t guess he would.  You know he’s Jewish, right?”

“Yes,” she said and got a faraway look.

“You were there.  Weren’t you?  You saw…” I said and she just nodded in response.  “You don’t have to talk about it, Peggy.  Not ever.  But if you ever wanted to…”

“Angie, it’s not something that should ever be forgotten but I’d like to think that you, at least, don’t need to carry it around for me.  I’d like to shield you from what I can.”

“You don’t have to, English.  If you ever change your mind…”

“I’ll let you know.”

“Okay,” I said and squeezed her hand.  “So what does Siegel meeting Mussolini and some Nazis have to do with Leviathan?”

“Well, that’s just it.  I think that one of your old friends was there too, and I think that’s the link to Leviathan.”

“Who?”

“Dottie Underwood.”

“Puttana!”

“Angie!”

“I haven’t forgotten what she did to you, English!  And I sure as hell haven’t forgotten how!”

She smiled at me.  “It seems that perhaps I’m not the only one with a jealous nature.”

“What?  I’m not jealous.  I haven’t got a jealous bone in my body!”

“Me thinks the lady doth protest too much.”  She leans into me again and kisses me slowly on the lips.  “You haven’t got a thing to be worried about, my darling.  You are much more fascinating to me than some Russian assassin.”

“You remember it too,” I say as I pull back from our kiss.

“I can’t think that I’ll ever forget it.”

“So why are you here?”

“Because if Dottie is in play she knows exactly who you are and what it would do to me if anything happened to you.  I don’t trust your safety to anyone but me.  Or about ten other agents.  Depending.”

“What makes you think she’s involved?”

“That, I can’t tell you, but it’s a reliable source.  I will not take any chances with your safety.  So I’m afraid that our little ruse is going to have to come to an end.”

“Don’t you get it, Peggy?  I can’t not go to Siegel’s party on Friday.  It would insult him.  I can’t afford to insult him on a personal or professional level.  I have to go.  There’s no way around it.”

“Angie…”

“No.  Believe me, I’d love not to go but I have to at this point.  We’ve been invited.  Howard will even have to show up.  You, because Liz Carver doesn’t exist, might get away with not going but Howard and I are sunk.”

“You’re not going anywhere near that man without me.”

“Howard or Siegel?”

“Siegel…or Howard either for that matter.  You’ve always fascinated him to a certain degree.  He was very happy when I told him that you and I had come to an understanding.  Something about, ‘I knew there was a reason she didn’t like me.’”

I laughed and blew out a breath.  Then to my embarrassment I yawned.

“Poor, darling.  You need your sleep.”

“And miss being with you.  I don’t think so.”

“What if I stayed and held you?  Would you sleep then?”

“I make no promises, English.”

“Darling, I want you to be awake the first time I make love to you.  Just let me hold you.  Perhaps I’ll even nap a bit as well.”

“English, if you’re offering to make love to me, I’m sure I could rally.”

She laughed.  “I’m absolutely besotted with you, but perhaps, just this once, let me hold you without any expectations?  Hmm?”

“Peggy Carter, you’re so unfair.  Fine, gorgeous.  Fine.  But when I wake up, all bets are off.”

“You have my word.”

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I woke up alone again to the sound of someone coming in my bedroom.  It took me a long time to be able to sleep in California.  New York has its own sound and it was all I had ever known.  In pictures they call it “walla.”  Walla is that background noise that you’d expect somewhere.  Like if you’re in a restaurant, you expect to hear sounds from knives and forks, conversation, trays and plates.  You wouldn’t expect to hear, say, the hum of a ballpark.  California didn’t sound right to me.  So I had become a light sleeper.  Well, except for last night/this morning.  I’d had the best night of sleep I could remember since I’d been out here.

I looked up to see Mr. Fancy walking in with a breakfast tray.  Looking down at the carpet instead of at me.  I take a quick inventory, see that I am very modestly dressed dammit and let him off the hook.

“Fancy!  It’s so good to see you!  I’m decent so you can look up.”

“Ah, yes.  Miss…Martin.   It is good to see you too,” he said as he continued to stand at attention.

“So…what’s on the tray?”

“Oh.  Miss Carter was called into work.  She wanted me to express her apologies for not being here to,” he looked to his eyebrows as if he was reading something written inside the front of his skull, “’to let you make good on your threat.’  I believe it was.  She did, however, want to treat you to an English breakfast regardless and has charged me with that task.”

Not quite the English breakfast I was hoping for, but still sweet just the same.  Then I caught a glimpse of what was on the tray.  “Mr. Jarvis is that?   Are those scones?!”

“Yes, and clotted cream.  Miss Carter insisted.  She said you’d become quite the fan.”

“Oh that’s so wonderful!  Thank you so much, Mr. Jarvis.”

He smiled at me genuinely pleased.  Then he set the tray across my lap.  He stood up and after a moment to straighten his waistcoat he spoke again.  “I did hate to wake you, Miss Martin but the studio called and they are expecting you on the lot at noon.  The car will be here at 11:30.”

I spoke around a piece of scone that had enough cream on it to choke a horse, “An’ wha’ time isit now?”

He cleared his throat.   “Ten a.m.”

“Okay then.  So anything I need to know about today?”

“Miss Carter wanted me to remind you that she would have some of her people watching you today.”

“And how am I supposed to know who her people are?”

He gestured to the tray.  “There is a folder there under your scones.  It has pictures of her agents in there.  She wants you to memorize it then I’m to do away with the contents of the file.”

“Jarvis, how did you and I get mixed up in this anyway?”

“Miss Martin, I’m sure I don’t know.  I suppose it would be loyalty though.”

“Yeah,” I said and blew out a breath.  “I suppose it is.”

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I spent the best part of the week shooting my picture and being followed around by Peggy’s goons.  I never saw Peggy.  I’d get a feeling on the back of my neck but I never could prove she was there.  I wrapped up my bit part in the Hope and Crosby picture and was set to begin my supporting role in the new Lucille Ball one next week.

You know I’d love to tell you that I was mad at Peggy.  That I was surprised she’d left me in the lurch like that.  But I wasn’t.  On either front.  All I could think about was falling asleep in her arms.  I don’t think I’ve ever, ever felt that safe.  I can’t remember ever sleeping that well, even in New York.  I was a goner.  Done for.  Stick a fork in me, done.  The last thing I remember was her pressing a kiss to my hairline on the back of my neck and saying, “Sleep, my darling angel.  I’ll keep you safe.  We’ll be together soon enough.”

See?  Goner.  You tell me that you wouldn’t’ve fallen head over heels right there if you weren’t already.  Go ahead.  I’m waiting.

I didn’t think so.

It was Thursday night and I wasn’t sure what the plan was for tomorrow.  I made sure Ned had plans out of town.  The last thing I needed was to put someone else in danger.  I was going to this thing stag.  Howard and Peggy were one thing but Ned had troubles enough on his own.  I was just thinking about what the best way to contact Peggy was when my phone rang.

“Hello.”

“Gloria, darling, this is Liz.”

So we were gonna play it this way.  “Liz.  Hey, how are you?  I haven’t seen you and Howard all week!”

“I know!  I’m so sorry.  Howard has been busy with something or other and I had family in from out of town.”

“Family?”

“Yes.  My cousin Timothy.”

I covered the receiver with my hand to hide the fact that I was laughing.  Peggy was claiming Dum Dum Dugan as her cousin.  “I’d love to meet him,” I manage.

“Funny you should say that.  Do you think Ned would mind if Timothy escorts you to the Siegel party tomorrow night?  I just can’t leave him at home and he doesn’t want to go stag.”

“Ned is out of town and he has nothing to worry about from me.  It’ll be fine.”

“Oh that’s fantastic!  We’ll pick you up.  Does seven work?”

“That’ll be fine.  Oh, and, Liz?”

“Yes?”

“Tell him I love to dance.”

She paused and then answered, “Of course.  See you tomorrow night.”

I was going to go to a mob party with Dum Dum Dugan.  Fantastic.  “Mother Mary, any sort of help you could provide on this one would be much appreciated,” I said out loud into my living room.

Friday arrived and I began the arduous, I really am gonna have to send that teacher a thank you card, task of getting ready.  I picked out a black satin sheath with thin straps, a fantastic view of my cleavage, and a short-waisted, long sleeved jacket.  It was very Bacall.  In fact, the studio had it made for her but they never used it and my dresser got ahold of it.  I was wearing ankle-breaking heels at least a half inch higher than almost anything I’d ever worn before.  I borrowed an aquamarine and diamond necklace that brought out my eyes, and also called attention to my cleavage.  Let’s be honest, if it was anywhere near Peggy’s, it could use all the help it could get.

When the doorbell rang, I had to stop myself from running to it.  All three of them were on the other side, Dum Dum in a tuxedo that had to have been made for him, Howard and looking breath-taking, Peggy.  I opened the door and they filed in.

Peggy was in a black dress with red accents.  Thank God this one covered her shoulders but her cleavage was as distracting as ever.  It took me a moment to realize she was speaking.  “Darling, my eyes are up here.”

I turned crimson, but decided to ignore her.  “Dum Dum, Howard,” I said and nodded at them.

“Hey Ang,” Dugan said picking me up and spinning me around for good measure.

“Dugan, for god’s sake, put her down,” Peggy said trying for exasperated but I could see the smile.

When he put me down I could see that he’d shaved off his mustache.  I couldn’t help myself, “Dugan, I ‘moustache’ you a question.”

Peggy rolled her eyes but answered me anyway.  “He shaved it off for you.  Behave.”

“Never,” I said and winked back at her.

Dugan laughed heartily.  “It’s okay, Ang.  It’ll grow back.  Peggy thought that I’d be less…what was it?”

“Conspicuous,” she supplied.

“Yeah, that, without it.”

“We really need to get a move on,” Howard interjected.

“Not necessarily.  Since you’ve all come in, it’s not outside the realm of possibilities that you all came in for a drink.  Shall we?”

“I’d love a drink,” Howard said.  “I’ll play bartender, all right?”  He asked and I just gestured toward the bar in response.  He looked over the contents of the bar and said, “Sidecars okay with everyone?”  We all nodded in response. 

Peggy began to speak.  “We think that the ledger for Siegel’s accounts is in a safe in his study.  I’m going to try and get in there tonight.  Howard will be in charge of a distraction both to get me in and to get me out.”

“What about me and Dum Dum?”

“Dugan is in charge of your safety.  That’s his only concern.”

“And me?”

“You’re to stay out of trouble.”

“C’mon, English I can help.”

“No.  I forbid it.”

“Forbid?!” My voice was high and strained.

Howard jumped in, “Now girls, let’s stay calm,” he said passing out sidecars.

“Angie, I will not have you in danger any more than necessary.  I will not,” Peggy said.

The look on her face of genuine fear made the decision for me.  Not that I was scared for me but I needed her to be worried about her.  “English, we’re havin’ a talk about this later but I’ll be on my best behavior.  What am I supposed to call Dum Dum?”

“Timothy Duncan at your service,” he said with a little bow.

“Gloria Martin,” I curtseyed.

After we’d all consumed our liquid courage, gone over the plan at least half a dozen more times, Peggy finally said, “Alright then, I suppose we’re ready.”

“Then the game is afoot!” I said and they all looked at me.  “What?  I read.  A girl can brush up on her culture.”

“I’m not sure that Mr. Holmes is anyone’s culture.  Not even mine.  I think he defies classification,” Peggy smiled indulgently, “but let’s go.”

 

Two hours later, during one of the dances Dugan and I shared, he’s a surprisingly good dancer, I was pushing him toward a shoving match involving Howard.  I whispered, “Go, Tim, she’s in.  I saw her.  He can’t keep this up.  Pull him away before they hurt him.”

“Peggy said,” he started.

“I don’t give a damn what she said.  Now go!” I pushed him for all the good it did.  He was a mountain of a man.

He gave in and walked calmly over to the scuffle.  The goons seemed to think better of it with Dugan standing there next to Howard.  I saw him smile and gesture toward the bartender for drinks all around.  Then out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Marco Benedetti one of Mickey Cohen’s men making his way to the study.  I slipped into the dark hallway that ran to the side of the study, adjusted the girls for maximum effect and stepped out into the light just in time to stop him from opening the study door.

“Oh my goodness!  You gave me a fright!” I said hopefully loud enough that Peggy knew she was about to have company.

“Miss, you shouldn’t be here.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.  I was just looking for the ladies room.  I need to apply some powder you see.  See here,” I gestured to my chest.  “I’m all shiny.”

He grinned at me.  “You sure are.  I can help you with that if you like.”

Poor sap.  He never even saw the brass bookend coming down on his head behind him.  Thunk!

Peggy eyed me suspiciously.  “Must you do that?” she asked as she began to drag him into the study.

“I had a limited about of time and I went with the tried and true.  Did you have to knock him out?”

“I suppose not, but I found that I wanted to,” she looked me over.

I smirked.  “Didja now?”

“I did.”

“How are we going to explain this?”

“Timothy Duncan will take the blame and disappear.  You don’t happen to know anything about safe cracking do you?  I’ve tried my hand at it, but I think it will take me too long.  Usually, I have a little gadget Howard designed that does it for me, but it’s not working.”

“Uncle Sal might have taught me a thing or three,” I answer.

“Be my guest.”  She gestured to the wall safe behind the desk.

I examined it.  You’d think a big gangster like Siegel would have a better safe.  Unfortunately for him, it was one my Uncle Sal had let me practice on when I was little.  “I’ll have this open in two shakes.”

“You are absolutely amazing.  Do you know that?” She asked me with a look of wonder on her face.

“Yeah.  I know.” I beamed back at her.  “Now go watch the door.”

After a few minutes, I manage to get the safe open and call to her, “Hey, it’s open.”

“Don’t touch anything.  Come here and watch the door.”

I do and she opens the safe up fully and begins to examine its contents, laying them out on the desk.  Then she pulls a pen out of her cleavage and begins pointing it at the ledger mostly. 

“Gee, Peg you got anything else in there I need to know about?” I say looking back at her.

“Not exactly.  Watch the door.”

“I’m watching.  I’m watching,” I say and turn back around.  That’s when I notice it.  The hallway next to the study opened into the end of the large room that most of the party guests were in.  From my vantage point, I could see that a small crowd had gathered in the space that I could see.  “English, you better hurry.”

“Why’s that?”

“I think Howard’s about to be assaulted by the entire cast of The Women.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“Yep.  Ow! Roz Russell just punched him in the mouth.  Something about giving out her private telephone number, if my lip-reading skills are up to par.  Oh, Joan Fontaine just slapped him!  I didn’t know he knew Joan.  You gotta hurry Peg!  Crawford is coming.  She might kill him.”

“Joan Crawford?”

“Yeah!”

“Fine.”  She arranged all the stuff in the safe the way we found it.  Closed it and put the god-awful painting back over it.  It looked good as new.  “When we get out of here, go and tell Dugan the plan.  Have him carry that man outside like they’ve had a fist fight.  Wouldn’t be the first time that worked.”

“I will.”

“Into the breach once more.  Shall we?”

“We shall.”

We managed to get back to my house relatively unscathed.  Peggy and Dum Dum handled the fight.  Peggy playing the damsel in distress.  She really should consider a career in pictures.  She’s a better actress that I could ever hope to be.  Dum Dum had held Marco up long enough for someone to see them both standing there and punched him.  When he came to, he had no memory of the hallway and seemed to believe everything we told him which was that he’d gotten fresh with me, Tim had taken offense and slugged him then they fought.  Peggy had punched Dum Dum in the nose when no one was watching just so Marco would feel like he got in a lick or two.

“Bourbon everyone?” I asked walking to the bar.

“Sounds great, Ang,” Howard answered rubbing his jaw.

“Howard, why does every actress in Hollywood have it in for you?” I asked.

“Not every actress.  I think Alexis Smith is still speaking to me,” he grinned that boyish grin of his.

“Ooh, Alexis Smith,” I hummed out and then I caught Peggy’s narrowed eyes.  “Purely an academic appreciation, English.  Just on principle.”  I finished pouring drinks and walked over handing them out.

“The two of you should start a club,” she said taking the drink out of my hand.

“Between the two of us, I’m pretty sure we’ve…” Howard started and I shut him down with a look and a grimace.  “I mean…”

“I have a very clear picture of what you mean.  Juveniles.  Both of you.”

“English,” I said in warning.

“You know Alexis Smith is Canadian.  I wonder if I can have her deported,” Peggy asked aloud and Dum Dum laughed heartily.

“Peggy, I never thought I’d see it again.  I’ve missed this you.  It looks good on you,” Dum Dum said.

“What’s that exactly?” she asked.

“Being in love,” he answered simply.  When Peggy, Howard, and I turned to him in shock, He said, “I’m not just some big ape.  I know things.  She suits you Peggy.”  Then he walked over and pressed a kiss to my forehead.  “Take care of her, especially when she says she doesn’t need it.”

I looked up and looked him in the eye.  “I will.”

 

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Miracle of miracles, it’s begun to rain, the driver brings the car around close to the house.  Howard and Dum Dum huddle close together around a spare raincoat I had.  If you weren’t too close it looked like two men and a smaller person, probably a woman, getting into the car.  Peggy drops the edge of the curtain back over the window she was using to observe their progress.  She turns back to me with a shy smile on her face.  “They’re safely away.”

“Good.  You want another drink?”

“No.  I don’t think so.  I don’t think that’s wise.”

“Why?”

She walks over to me, all strut and swagger.  I’m completely mesmerized by the sway of her hips, she smirk on her lips.  “Because I want to remember every, single, moment of this.”  Then she takes my head in her hands and kisses me, and god almighty, I’ve heard girls talk about fireworks, and stars behind their eyelids when they, you know, but I’ve never heard anybody talk about it happening with a kiss.

I pull away because my knees are weak and I’m panting and breathless.  My arms feel heavy and the room has gotten as hot as the steam room at the ladies club where the studio pays my membership fees.  “English, you don’t have to rush into nothing.”

She holds me up in those strong arms, pulls me close and again and whispers into my ear, “I’ll have to disagree with you my darling.  I feel like this is long overdue.”

I’m trembling.  I realize that I’m nervous.  Hell, I’m terrified.  For all my experience, being with Peggy, here, like this, everything I’ve ever wanted in front of me, terrifies me.  “Peggy,” I say and I see her surprise at me using her name but she doesn’t say anything.  She just waits.  “Peggy, I’m scared.”

“Of what, my darling angel?” She asks, still holding me close.

“You,” I say and she steps back suddenly and I wish I could have bitten off my own tongue.  As it is, I almost slide to the floor.

“Oh.  I’m sorry.  I know my work has always been in the abstract for you…” she’s wringing her hands in front of her.

I reach out and still them with my own.   “Not that, English.  You, tonight, in your element.  How would you say it?  Well, it had some things going on in my…knickers.  That’s not it at all.”

She took a small breath in relief.  “Then what?”

“Peggy, I have to know.  I mean, I haven’t been able to get over you, and I’ve tried English, believe me I’ve tried.  If we take this step, this is it for me.  I have to know that it’s it for you too.  There aren’t enough women in the world for me to get over you if we do this.”

She smiles so broadly her eyes crinkle at the edges, “My darling angel, if we do this, and I have anything to say about it, I’ll be the last woman you ever sleep with.  You have my word.”

“What if I’m no good?”

“I do hope that your paramours in my absence were good for something.  Are you always this nervous?”

“No.  Never before.”

“Darling,” she says and then kisses me fiercely robbing me of any remaining breath.  I realize I’m swaying on my feet when she finally stops kissing me.  “Can you make it up the stairs or do I need to carry you?”

I come out of my daze, determined to give as good as I got.  “I can make it, English.  You’re gonna need to save your strength for what I have in mind.”  I pulled her along and we giggled up the stairs and into my bedroom.

I undress Peggy with the quick efficiency of someone who’s very practiced at it.  When I didn’t stop our kiss to undo her bra with one hand, I heard her tiny harrumph.  I didn’t give her time to think too much on how I got so good at that particular move because I was busy teasing the underside of her jaw with my teeth.  She was almost completely undressed save for her underwear, her stockings, and her heels.  I still had all my clothes on.  I was maneuvering her to the bed and when her legs backed up against it, I said, “Get on the bed, English, and wait for me.”

She pulled herself up the bed using her hands, her legs out in front of her, her eyes never leaving me.  She looked absolutely delicious.  I took a long slow breath in to appreciate her.  Her breasts were exposed in all their glory.  She was in black stockings, underwear, and garter belt.  She looked…ripe, and mine for the taking.

I was very glad I’d taken the time to really dress for the evening.  I unzipped the sheath and let it fall.  Exposing my real outfit for the evening to Peggy, who gulped, which pleased me.  It was a siren red bustier, or merry widow, depending on which of my dressers you talked to, with matching underwear.  I was wearing a black garter belt and black stockings.  I had her undivided attention.  I walked to the bed and stepped out of my heels.  They’d gotten me the reaction I was hoping for.  I wanted to reach for her breasts first thing but I stopped myself. 

Slowly, I reached for Peggy’s right foot, unbuckled her shoe, slid it off and let it drop to the floor.  I repeated the action with her other foot, spreading her legs wide for me so that I could kneel between them.  Then I leaned down and kissed the inside of her thighs tracing the garters with my tongue.  “Oh, bloody hell!  Angela Martinelli, if you don’t make love to me right now, I’m going to throw you over my knee and spank you!”

I continued to kiss tease her thighs.  Then I looked up at her unperturbed.  “You could try, English.  You could try, but then you’d miss this.”  With that I covered her sex with my hand and pressed firmly.  She braced herself on the bed with her feet and tried to push herself onto my hand.  “Ah, ah, ah.  You like to be teased, English.  And with all the wanting and the waiting we’ve done, a few more minutes aren’t gonna do you in.”

“I wouldn’t bet on it,” she huffed.

I laughed.  Not at her but that she thought this wasn’t the hardest thing I’d ever done.  I’ve wanted to do decidedly unfriendly things to Peggy since we met.  “If I can stand it, so can you.”  I unhooked her stockings one by one and rolled them down her legs, licking and kissing the entire time.

“Please,” Peggy says softly and it has more of an effect on me than if she’d demanded at the top of her lungs.

I nod in acknowledgement and then pull her underwear and the garter belt off her.  I dip my head and taste her for the first time.  She was succulent.  I really do need to send that teacher a thank you note.  I realize Peggy is pulling me up to her then.  “What is it, Peggy?” I brush her hair back from her forehead.

“I need to know it’s you, darling angel.  Stay.  With me.”  She grabs my biceps almost painfully.

“Of course, whatever you need.  I’m here.  I’ve got you.  It’s me, English.  It’s me.”  I kiss her tenderly and put one hand under her neck exposing her sensitive throat to me.  I’m kissing her, then working my way to her collarbones.  I brush my other hand lightly over her breast for the first time and I feel my pulse quicken.  She has the most glorious breasts and I’ve always touched them through clothing up till now.  “Is this okay?” I ask.

“More.  Oh, God, Angie.  More.”

I’m not exactly sure what that direction is but I’ll be damned if I don’t give Peggy Carter what she needs.  “Peggy, is it okay if I…” I move my head down toward her breasts, asking permission, making sure that that’s not too far away.

“Please,” she says in an almost moan.

I begin as gently as I can but I’m so excited I’m afraid I’m going to be too rough for her.  Her breasts are spectacular.  I mean I’ve seen Jane Russell’s and she’s got nothing on Peggy.  “God, English, you’re so beautiful,” I say moving from one breast to the other.  I slide my free hand down her side and rest it on her hip.

She moves it over her center and says, “Touch me, or do you want me to beg?”

“Never.  I just wanted to make sure you’re sure.”

“Damn sure.”

I slide over her then and she’s slick and wet.  I glide over her gently and she begins to speak…in Italian?  It takes a minute for that realization to happen.  “Wha’?”

“Ti amo!”

“E io ti amo,” I say reverently as I slide into her.  She closes around my fingers almost immediately. 

“Più forte,” she gasps out.  I push into her harder hoping that I’m not too rough with her.  She responds immediately with a noise that if I were made of weaker stuff would have made me come undone right there.  I love the feel of her.  I’m looking into her eyes and she’s looking into mine.  Then she wraps her legs around me pining me to her.  “Più veloce,” she commands.

“Qualsiasi cosa tu voglia,” I answer.  I pick up the pace and drive her ruthlessly.  She’s calling out my name now, moaning it like a prayer.  This is as close to god as I’ve ever felt.  “Così bella…”  She stiffens then and her eyes close.  I cannot be denied, not now.  “Guardami! Non chiudere gli occhi!”  She keeps her eyes closed.  “English!  Please, look at me!”  She does and I watch her world explode.  It’s the most beautiful, most intimate moment of my life.  She screams my name and her body shakes and shakes.  Finally, her eyes close.

I keep petting her and kissing her gently until those beautiful brown eyes look at me and she smiles like the cat who’s caught the canary.  She snuggles into my neck and begins kissing the sensitive skin there.  “I should be very cross with you,” she says between kisses.

I’m still recovering from what I just witnessed.  “Uh…why is that?”

“I’m assuming that you had to have had a lot of practice to be as good as that was.”

I laugh.  “English, I ain’t never experienced anything like that.  God’s honest truth,” I say and tilt her head up to look her in the eyes.

“Do you swear?”

“Like a sailor.”

She hits my arm.  “Really?”

“Peggy, if I live to be a hundred, I’ll never get over the sight of you as you came undone.  It was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

“You are such a sweet-talker.”

“I’m serious, English.  It was beautiful.  You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”

“And Alexis Smith?”

“Who?”  I say and she tickles me then.  “Stop!  Stop!  I give up!” I yell and she just stops and laughs.  “English?”

“Yes my darling angel?”

“Why…why were you speaking Italian?”

“Because your heart’s Italian,” she says and blushes furiously.

“Gah…English, you gotta stop bein’ so perfect!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obviously, some of the people mentioned in this fic were real. However, it's best just to assume that I made most of it up and that the people here are nothing like what they were in real life.  
> Oh and I know the spanking thing might be a bit odd but I'm pretty sure it's period appropriate.  
> Finally, I couldn't stop myself from slipping in the phrase that is my pen name into the fic. Bonus points if you spot it.

**Author's Note:**

> This started because of that photo of HA in that Newsboy hat and tank top. You've seen it. Anyway, 10k words in and I'm not sure where this is going. If you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them.
> 
> Oh and I'm sorry about the Italian. I used Google Translator. Hopefully, it's not too bad. If anyone wants to edit the Italian for me, I'd be ever so grateful.


End file.
